2023

No one knew exactly when it began, but from some point on, Chi Xiaoman rarely fought that hard for anything anymore.

She no longer rode her e-bike through every street and alley just to find someone and say thank you. She no longer ran ten laps around the school field under the scorching sun to win herself even the slightest chance, and afterward felt no shame over her effort or what she had given.

And she certainly no longer fought entirely for herself for the role of Xiaoyu, even going so far as to block opportunities from reaching her more than once...

Until.

She received the USB drive and saw her twenty-year-old self again, in the flesh.

She wasn’t sure whether that counted as a conversation. But after opening the video, Chi Xiaoman couldn’t ignore a faint feeling, as if she and her twenty-year-old self were separated by only a thin membrane.

At twenty, she probably never would have dreamed that by thirty, she would become cowardly, timid, and habitually think things through more and more before acting. She had spent so long suppressing her emotions and needs that she no longer dared to speak her desires and dreams aloud, and was always mired in confusion, no longer sure what she truly wanted.

If not for Neon serving as the thread running through those ten years, she might have drifted through them even more muddle-headedly. And now that Neon had finished filming, the things she had hidden away for ten years still had to be faced. She realized that with everything settled, she seemed only to have grown more lost.

Fortunately.

Before the old anchor disappeared, a new one was already there. Chi Xiaoman just didn’t dare answer it, didn’t dare admit it, and didn’t dare fight for herself. Not until, in the midst of her confusion, she received this USB drive whose origin she still didn’t know.

And so she had to admit that this anchor had actually been there all along. It was just that for too long, she had deliberately ignored it.

She wanted to see her. Right now.

The thought came simply.

So this thirty-year-old Chi Xiaoman, who was not brave, not honest, and no longer good at fighting for herself, simply chose to do it.

She came to a city completely unfamiliar to her.

Just as she had done at twenty.

That made Chi Xiaoman feel a rush of freshness, a pounding in her chest, a thrill, as if a little bird were beating its wings between her lungs and her heart. It also made her feel some hesitation, unease, and fear.

But none of it stopped her.

It was as if she had returned to a time of youthful intensity.

Chi Xiaoman bought a plane ticket, went to the airport, boarded, got off, searched for an address in a city she knew nothing about, and when she arrived, her heart was pounding so hard she felt it might leap out of her chest; she didn’t even remember that she could have called first. By the time she reached the hospital, she discovered she didn’t know which ward Chen Yue’s mother was in, and her phone had shut off because she hadn’t prepared well enough...

But she didn’t take that as some kind of “bad” omen.

Because when she stood at the hospital entrance and looked at the rows of lights shining inside,

and thought that she and Chen Yue might be separated by only a few hundred meters, or a few dozen, her heart began to race wildly, giving her a dizzy, out-of-control feeling.

The hospital entrance was crowded and noisy. Chi Xiaoman pressed a hand to her unusually erratic heartbeat and suddenly realized that when you wanted to see someone, there was no way to be fully prepared. It turned out that running to see the person you wanted to see was always messy and strange.

It didn’t matter that she didn’t know which building the ward was in. It didn’t matter that her phone had no battery. Chi Xiaoman searched building by building, floor by floor. If she had been a little smarter, she could have borrowed a phone from someone.

But suddenly she became very dumb; she couldn’t remember to do that, and her memory also seemed to have gone bad, so she couldn’t remember Chen Yue’s number either.

She became a girl who was a little silly, a little innocent, and still charging straight ahead; a girl who ran to a strange city to see the person she liked.

Ding—

The elevator doors opened on some floor of some building.

Chi Xiaoman looked up and saw Chen Yue.

There were many people in the elevator, and many people outside it too. Chen Yue stood among the crowd, still wearing the same outfit she had on that morning. The skin visible at her open collar was very white, yet it made Chi Xiaoman feel as though they hadn’t seen each other in a very long time.

Chen Yue was wearing a mask, looking down at her phone; she didn’t see Chi Xiaoman. But she had always been the kind of person who stood out in a crowd. Maybe because hospital matters kept her busy, the fatigue in her eyes and brows remained distinct, restrained, and captivating.

The din rushed into Chi Xiaoman’s ears. Several people brushed past her shoulders into the elevator from behind. Chi Xiaoman hurried along with the crowd and squeezed in, but carefully found a place very close to Chen Yue—

Right in front of her. If she took one step back and turned around, she could look directly into her eyes at close range.

But the elevator was too crowded, filled with many unfamiliar smells.

Chi Xiaoman felt uneasy and had to take a step back, nearly stepping on Chen Yue’s foot. That made her suddenly feel a kind of panic, like the exhilaration of adolescence when you got too close to the person you liked—

Awkward and foolishly, she tensed both hands, then pretended she hadn’t recognized Chen Yue, pretended she had spent a long time searching this hospital and wasn’t here for Chen Yue at all, and said very normally, “Sorry.”

Chen Yue didn’t speak. Her breathing was light, hidden beneath the noisy voices in the elevator.

But after that, she stepped forward, as if she had sensed the awkwardness of Chi Xiaoman’s movement.

Only someone else had recognized Chi Xiaoman first.

So Chi Xiaoman had no choice but to lower the brim of her cap and say in a muffled voice, “Sorry, you’ve got the wrong person.”

She didn’t turn around.

She didn’t see Chen Yue’s expression.

She didn’t meet Chen Yue’s eyes at all.

And yet after that, she heard Chen Yue let out a very soft laugh.

It wasn’t obvious.

No third person in the elevator should have heard it.

But because of Chi Xiaoman’s words, everyone’s gaze fell on her in turns.

So Chi Xiaoman lowered her face even more and shrank her shoulders to make herself less noticeable.

But after that sentence.

The looks on her never stopped.

Curious, appraising, suspicious...

After all, by any reasonable measure, Chi Xiaoman should not have been in the hospital elevator of this small city at this moment.

Chi Xiaoman pressed her lips together.

Ding—

The elevator reached the next floor.

Someone quietly slipped out from behind her.

It was Chen Yue.

After stepping out, she did not leave immediately. Instead, she held down the elevator’s door-open button and looked at Chi Xiaoman in silence.

Most of the people in the elevator were focused on Chi Xiaoman and didn’t pay much attention to Chen Yue outside.

Chi Xiaoman, stunned, lifted her eyes.

They looked at each other.

There was only the bright light between their eyes.

A few seconds later.

Chen Yue curved her eyes at her.

Chi Xiaoman came to her senses and didn’t wait any longer.

She kept her head down, muttering “sorry” several times, and squeezed past the people near the elevator doors.

Once she came out, the world felt much wider, much brighter. No one knew what department this floor belonged to; the corridor wasn’t very crowded.

Chen Yue’s gaze stayed on her as she slowly let go of the door-open button.

The elevator doors closed behind them. The watching eyes disappeared, and Chi Xiaoman let out a long breath.

Chen Yue looked at her. She had been looking at her since just now, without asking why she had come.

Chi Xiaoman clenched her fingers.

She also hurriedly looked up at Chen Yue.

But when she met Chen Yue’s soft, warm gaze, she hurriedly looked away again, staring at the scattered people in the corridor.

“Let’s go first. Don’t stand in front of the elevator,” Chen Yue said.

Maybe it was an illusion; maybe she had always been like this. Chi Xiaoman always felt that even when Chen Yue spoke such ordinary words, her tone still held a great deal of water-soft tenderness.

“Okay.” Chi Xiaoman nodded woodenly.

Chen Yue led Chi Xiaoman along the corridor. After a moment of silence, she asked, “Have you been looking for me for a long time?”

“No.” Chi Xiaoman shook her head. She always followed one step behind Chen Yue and didn’t come too close. “Why didn’t you find a bigger hospital for your mom?”

She meant that this hospital was relatively small; she hadn’t searched for too long.

Chen Yue stopped, her shadow falling across the tips of Chi Xiaoman’s shoes. “Xiaoman.”

Chi Xiaoman stopped too. “Hm? What is it?”

Chen Yue lowered her eyes, looking at the two shadows in front of and behind them. After a long while, she spoke gently, “Walk with me.”

Chi Xiaoman froze.

Chen Yue smiled at her. Maybe because she had spent the whole day busy with hospital matters, she looked a little tired now, but the way she smiled was still beautiful.

“Okay.” Chi Xiaoman finally reacted.

She also took a somewhat awkward step forward.

And walked beside Chen Yue.

“Is this okay?” she asked cautiously.

Chen Yue smiled. She seemed to find her amusing. She called her “Xiaoman,” and after saying her name, she smiled even more sincerely, not hiding any fatigue from her.

“Why don’t you ask where I’m taking you?”

At that, Chi Xiaoman blinked in confusion.

Only then did she notice that in her field of vision, there were people in hospital gowns slowly walking while holding IV poles, nurses in white uniforms bent over the nurse’s station pulling files, and doctors in white coats hurrying past them.

The two of them stood in this hurried world, a short distance between their shoulders, as if two leaves drifting slowly down had met here and found comfort in each other’s presence.

Then Chen Yue said,

“Chi Xiaoman, have you eaten?”

Chi Xiaoman hadn’t expected Chen Yue to ask that. She was stunned for a moment, then honestly shook her head. “No.”

“Mm.” Chen Yue nodded, her voice gentle. “Then keep me company for a meal first, okay?”

“Okay.” Chi Xiaoman nodded slowly. She would not refuse Chen Yue’s request.

“Good.” Chen Yue nodded too, then smiled at her again and reached over to pat her head.

“After we eat, if you still think it’s necessary, I’ll take you to see my mom.”

It was unexpected. On the way here, Chi Xiaoman had been anxious and uneasy, unable to settle her mind.

But the moment she truly saw Chen Yue’s eyes, she suddenly felt that maybe she didn’t need to think about anything bad at all.

“Okay.” She nodded at Chen Yue.

“She just had surgery and is resting now.” Probably afraid she would worry, Chen Yue mentioned it again on the way down to eat. “Don’t worry; the surgery went smoothly.”

Chi Xiaoman nodded, truly letting out a breath for Chen Yue. “That’s good.”

Actually, running into the same person twice in the same elevator, out of sync with time, was a very unbelievable thing. But Chi Xiaoman couldn’t have imagined that both times, it would happen to her and Chen Yue.

So when they got on the elevator again and headed to eat near the hospital, Chi Xiaoman felt, for the first time, that maybe this was fate favoring her.

Or perhaps it was the rare good karma she had earned after so many years of being a not-very-competent Rainbow Sister.

Chen Yue couldn’t go too far from the hospital, so after going downstairs, they ended up at a soup-and-rice shop nearby.

There weren’t many people inside, and not many tables either. Maybe because summer was nearly here, not many people wanted soup and rice.

They found a table in the corner and sat down. The lighting was dim and the spot secluded; no one paid them any attention.

Chen Yue placed the order. When the soup rice was brought over, she very considerately helped Chi Xiaoman put the pork offal, beef balls, and fresh meat into it, then pressed the rice down, let it soak, and handed the whole bowl to her.

“Thank you.” Chi Xiaoman awkwardly took four chopsticks out of the holder, then took two spoons as well, carefully divided them into two sets, and held them both in her hands, planning to hand them over to Chen Yue when it was convenient.

Chen Yue may have noticed her movements and couldn’t help laughing, her voice carrying a smile. “You’re welcome.”

Chi Xiaoman also felt that she had suddenly become very disappointing. They had already eaten many meals together, but for some reason, today’s meal felt especially tense.

To hide her nerves, she lowered her head and tucked the strands of hair hanging down behind her ear.

“Has your hair gotten longer again?” Chen Yue suddenly asked.

“Hm?” Chi Xiaoman looked at her, while Chen Yue was preparing her own bowl of soup rice, slowly pressing the rice into the broth. She answered slowly, “Maybe a little.”

“Mm, your hair has always grown faster than other people’s,” Chen Yue said.

Chi Xiaoman froze.

She looked up at Chen Yue through the rising steam from the soup rice. Suddenly she remembered that Chen Yue had said something similar more than once. But each time, Chi Xiaoman had never thought much of it.

“Really?”

After staring at Chen Yue for a long time, Chi Xiaoman spoke slowly. “I... I’m not really sure.”

“Mm, it does.”

Chen Yue spoke slowly, her gaze on her carrying a hint of a smile. “I remember back then, you’d trim the ends about once every month or two. Maybe because summers were too hot, and you didn’t like it too long, so you were used to keeping it around collarbone length. So while we were still in Beijing, your hair always stayed at that length.”

“Later, after I went to Hong Kong and came back, I found your hair had gotten much longer.”

Chi Xiaoman’s lips moved with difficulty.

She had never known this detail.

She hadn’t realized that back in that hard-to-bear winter, when she saw Chen Yue’s unfamiliar coat and purple scarf, Chen Yue had also seen her much longer hair.

Perhaps at that time, she wasn’t the only one feeling lost and uneasy. Chen Yue had also felt the same loss and fear. These were things she hadn’t known.

Which meant she had done many things back then that she thought were mature, considerate, and meant to push Chen Yue away.

Chen Yue.

No.

Chen Tong.

At that time, had she actually been very sad too?

Was it possible that...

Sometimes Chi Xiaoman, like her mother, also forced Chen Yue to make the choices she wanted?

At the thought of this possibility.

And of the fact that the choices of the past could never be undone.

Chi Xiaoman didn’t know whether she should admit her regret; it was almost impossible to speak.

But Chen Yue smiled, seeming to have no insistence that she respond. So she went on, “And after that, every time we met, I felt like your hair was longer than the last time.”

Her tone was natural. “But back then, we didn’t meet very often.”

Yet her voice was very, very soft. “So maybe it was just my imagination.”

After she finished.

As if sensing that she had made the mood heavy, Chen Yue didn’t continue. She lifted her face and smiled at Chi Xiaoman.

“Let’s eat first.”

Then she reached out for the utensils Chi Xiaoman was still gripping tightly.

Chi Xiaoman realized this and let out a shaky breath, handing them over while trying hard to respond. “Okay.”

Chen Yue took the utensils.

She scooped up a spoonful of soup rice and didn’t rush to eat it, instead saying with her eyes lowered,

“It might be a little hot. Eat slowly.”

“Okay.” Chi Xiaoman agreed.

Only then did she use her own spoon to take a bite of the soup rice.

Maybe because the steam was thick, her eyes reddened while she was blowing it cool.

And she couldn’t help saying, “I’m sorry.”

Chen Yue paused for a moment. “It’s okay.”

Then she said, “You don’t owe me an apology.”

Her voice softened. “So eat first.”

“Okay... okay.”

Chi Xiaoman tried to let out a breath and put the spoonful of soup rice into her mouth.

She thought Chen Yue had spent the whole day running around and really did need to eat a proper meal. As for anything else, they could wait until after they’d finished eating.

But the more she thought about it, the more Chi Xiaoman realized—

After their reunion, Chen Yue had always done this. No matter how much she disagreed with Chi Xiaoman’s actions or words, she would still be willing to eat with her, watch her finish bite by bite, and then talk to her.

At that thought.

Tears fell from her eyes again.

One drop.

Two drops.

Chi Xiaoman hurriedly closed her eyes and wiped them away.

But in the next second.

Noticing it, Chen Yue silently pulled out a tissue and handed it to her.

Chi Xiaoman hurriedly took it and quickly wiped her eyes. “Thank you, thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Chen Yue said slowly.

After a pause, she added, as if trying to comfort her, “Don’t eat too fast.”

“Mm... mm.” Chi Xiaoman nodded. “I know.”

Chen Yue didn’t say anything else. She looked at Chi Xiaoman for a while, seeming to realize that being watched by her only made her more unable to continue eating, so she withdrew her gaze on her own and slowly ate her own bowl of soup rice.

Only then did Chi Xiaoman gradually calm down.

She didn’t cry anymore.

She ate the soup rice one bite at a time.

It was hot and comforting; eating it in this season would make you sweat. But it tasted good, and after a while it made Chi Xiaoman feel that the empty feeling in her stomach all day had finally eased a little.

They didn’t talk much during the meal.

This meal happened many years later, near a hospital, in a city completely unfamiliar to Chi Xiaoman, yet it didn’t make her feel uneasy at all. It was as if it were simply one of the ordinary meals they had eaten together before.

After they finished.

Chen Yue paid the bill.

Like Felicity Noodle Shop, this shop also had mouth-freshening candies on the counter for customers to take freely.

Chen Yue brought over two.

But the wrappers on these two candies were hard to deal with. So the two of them began to look like two children who had never eaten candy before, facing each other, awkwardly tearing open the wrappers; then, seeing that the other was also struggling, they each hurriedly stuffed the candy into their mouths.

Finally, they both looked up at the same time.

And saw each other’s eyes.

They both suddenly laughed.

The laughter was light, and in the small soup-and-rice shop, it wasn’t out of place at all. They looked like two ordinary young people laughing simply because they had met each other’s gaze.

After laughing for a while.

Chen Yue looked at Chi Xiaoman, the corners of her eyes curving slightly. “Xiaoman, do you know why I asked you to eat with me first?”

“I don’t know.” Chi Xiaoman answered honestly.

“Mm.” Chen Yue nodded. “Because I didn’t eat anything all day.”

“Every time I meet my mom, I don’t have much of an appetite.”

The soup shop’s lighting spread like golden pumpkin syrup. Chen Yue’s voice was very soft, drowned by the street noise,

“But when I saw you, I suddenly wanted you to eat with me.”

Chi Xiaoman picked at her fingers, then opened her mouth. “Then... then are you full?”

The question was probably a little silly, so when Chen Yue heard it, she laughed again.

That made Chi Xiaoman feel awkward.

She put her hand under the table, scratched at the web between her thumb and forefinger, and pressed her lips together around the sweet candy in her mouth, a little flustered.

“Also because—”

After a moment of silence, Chen Yue spoke slowly. “Back then, I didn’t ask you first whether you had eaten.”

Chi Xiaoman froze.

Chen Yue lifted the corners of her lips faintly. “Actually, I’ve kept thinking about it afterward too.”

This might have been the first time they had mentioned that period of the past directly, face to face, without avoiding it. Because it was too painful, because after growing up the rules of the world were about propriety, and going back over pain was unnecessary and would only hurt both sides.

But Chen Yue still said it.

“When I saw you in the elevator just now, I didn’t speak right away because I was thinking about what I should say and do to be the most appropriate, the clearest in expressing what I wanted to say.”

“But what I thought about most was the first time you came to Hong Kong to find me, when we got back together for the first time. These past few years, I’ve always regretted it, because I felt that at that time, the first thing I should have asked was whether you had been eating properly.”

Her voice remained very soft, seemingly calm, yet also seeming as if she had gone over these words in her heart many times, so there was no pause.

“Because you came to Hong Kong alone, and it was your first time here too. It must have been very hard; you must have suffered a lot, because I didn’t turn around and come find you right away.”

“Also because this city was completely unfamiliar to you, but you still came so bravely, and came here just to find me. You never told me how hard it was for you to find me, but you still somehow found me, and you were willing to give me a bouquet of flowers when my first film wrapped.”

“But after that, I didn’t take good care of you.”

When she said that.

Chen Yue seemed to feel pain, so much so that she had to stare into Chi Xiaoman’s eyes and pause for a long time before continuing,

“Later, we still broke up. And I always think of you from then, think of you standing carefully behind me, think of you so bravely holding a bouquet of flowers and coming back to my side.”

“Actually, I wasn’t that mature at that age either, but I always wanted to be the kind of adult who could handle everything in front of you; I thought I could protect you, so I ignored the fact that you also had the right to face all of this, which is why we ended up with so many problems afterward.”

To be frank, Chi Xiaoman did not agree with Chen Yue placing all the blame for their separation on herself.

But she realized this might be Chen Yue’s way of laying herself bare before her, so she didn’t rush to object.

Her face was pale, her eyes red again, and the fingers clutching the web between her thumb and forefinger were using a great deal of force.

But she still chose to listen. After all, this was something Chi Xiaoman had rarely had the chance to do in their past relationship.

Chen Yue did not cry. She looked into Chi Xiaoman’s eyes and said to her through the warm yellow light of the soup shop, “So today, it should have been me coming to find you.”

“I’m sorry, Xiaoman.”

She smiled at Chi Xiaoman.

It might have been a smile that appeared rarely on Chen Yue’s face, and would seem strange, unnatural, even forced.

“Instead, it’s still you coming to find me.”

The end of the sentence was very soft, like a drop of water falling onto a cloud and being swallowed.

After she said it.

She looked at Chi Xiaoman, the curve at the corner of her eye seeming like a smile, yet also not. They met each other’s gaze, and in her eyes there seemed to be a great deal of sorrow, loneliness, and yet also a wide, quiet river.

The river waited for an answer, but not impatiently.

Chi Xiaoman didn’t speak right away.

She looked into Chen Tong’s eyes. She looked very hard, but after a long time her vision was still blurry.

A couple came into the soup shop and sat at the table behind them. The two of them chatted about ordinary things like what to eat tomorrow and what movie to watch tonight. Just as they were talking about, “At what moment do you feel you love me the most?”—

Chi Xiaoman suddenly stood up.

There was only a table between them. She wanted to go around from her side to Chen Tong’s side.

It was clearly only a few steps, but Chi Xiaoman still walked a little unsteadily.

When she reached Chen Tong’s front.

It took her several seconds.

to spread her arms—imagining herself as a wide river, a tiny spider, a thin sheet of paper, a shaky rubber figure easily blown over by the wind.

She hugged Chen Yue.

Chen Yue probably felt dazed too.

So she also took some time before slowly lifting her arms to hug her back, without using much force.

The soup shop was full of flickering light and noisy voices. Chi Xiaoman did her best to hold Chen Yue tightly and called her, “Sister Chen Tong.”

“Mm?” Chen Yue answered.

She was very quiet and didn’t hurry to speak, as if she were willing to give Chi Xiaoman the chance to be brave again.

Because she had never been as un-mature as she had said; because she had never given up on Chi Xiaoman.

Since their reunion, it had clearly been her stepping toward Chi Xiaoman again and again, and also her telling her over and over, “You’re welcome,” “It’s okay,” “You deserve it,” “I want to be your Rainbow Sister”...

And so once again, with her encouragement and guidance, Chi Xiaoman was given this precious chance to become brave again.

“The film is finished.”

Chi Xiaoman realized she seemed to be crying in front of Chen Yue again, but she no longer felt much fear about it.

So she said to Chen Yue, “Can... can we make up now?”

Car horns sounded, and the noisy silhouettes of vehicles passed back and forth behind the glass, like a golden river flowing through this city, gathering the two of them, tiny as they were, together once more. After a long time, Chen Yue said softly,

“Mm, I think so.”

-

The hug didn’t last very long, and neither did the tears.

New customers kept coming into the soup shop.

So after saying “I think so,” Chen Yue lightly patted Chi Xiaoman’s back.

Chi Xiaoman lightly patted Chen Yue’s head in return.

They didn’t say much more.

They simply ended the hug in tacit agreement.

Then walked out of the soup shop side by side.

It was only when they lifted the curtain at the door that Chen Yue suddenly asked, “Xiaoman, why did you suddenly come looking for me?”

Only then did Chi Xiaoman remember the USB drive. “I...”

“Did you receive a USB drive too?” Chen Yue seemed to have sensed it.

“Yes.” Chi Xiaoman was a little surprised. Walking side by side with Chen Yue along the street, she thought again of the contents on the drive and felt somewhat dazed.

But that also made her slowly realize one thing. “Sister Chen Tong, you got one too?”

“Mm.” Chen Yue nodded. “But I still don’t know who sent it.”

“Do you know?” She stopped and asked Chi Xiaoman.

Chi Xiaoman stopped with her and shook her head. “I still don’t know.”

“Mm, that’s fine if we don’t know yet.” Chen Yue nodded, continuing forward. “We’ll ask again when we get back to Hong Kong.”

“Okay.” Chi Xiaoman nodded too, following her again. “But if they chose this date, they probably aren’t a bad person.”

Chen Yue suddenly laughed.

Chi Xiaoman was a bit confused. “What’s wrong?”

Chen Yue looked at her and smiled for a long while, then shook her head. “Nothing.”

Chi Xiaoman pressed her lips together.

Suddenly not knowing what to say, she simply kept following Chen Yue forward and continued looking around this unfamiliar city.

For this small city near the tropics, it already seemed to be summer. The night air was hot, and the people coming and going on the streets were generally wearing comfortable, loose T-shirts.

This was Chen Yue’s hometown.

After walking for a while, Chi Xiaoman suddenly felt something strange about that.

Even a sense of familiarity.

The unfamiliarity in her heart seemed to vanish all at once. She suddenly no longer felt this was a city she had never been to.

It felt as if she had grown up here once too, ridden a bicycle through these streets, bought two-yuan steamed buns at a breakfast shop and hung them on the handlebars, and hurried into a classroom with old desks and chairs back when she was in middle school.

But halfway through, Chen Yue seemed to suddenly remember something and hesitantly said, “Xiaoman, can you wait here for me for a moment?”

“Hm?” Chi Xiaoman realized this might not be the best time for a date. “Is something up with your mom?”

“No.” Chen Yue shook her head. “I just want to go buy something.”

“Okay.” Chi Xiaoman cooperated and nodded.

After all, Chen Yue’s mom was still hospitalized, and there really were many things to buy.

So after Chen Yue left.

When Chi Xiaoman stood alone by the roadside waiting, she also went into a brightly lit fruit shop. The owner was a woman in her fifties or sixties; maybe she didn’t recognize her, but she enthusiastically introduced local specialty fruits to her, and also taught her a special way of eating fruit—cut it into pieces, sprinkle sweet-sour plum powder on top, and mix it up before eating.

Chi Xiaoman found it novel, but in the end, considering that Chen Yue’s mother was a patient who had just had surgery, she only chose a few very simple seasonal fruits and asked the owner to pack them nicely, saying she could pay more.

Maybe because she paid extra for the packaging, but she still smiled. So when the owner bagged them for her, she also asked with a smile, “In a good mood today?”

Chi Xiaoman couldn’t deny it. But considering Chen Yue’s mother had just had surgery and was still in the hospital, she restrained the corners of her mouth and said very softly, “A little.”

Which made her feel somewhat guilty.

After the packing was done.

Chi Xiaoman quickly took the bag from the owner’s hands, no longer looking at her smiling gaze, and stood by the roadside patiently waiting for Chen Yue to come back with the beautifully wrapped fruit in hand.

Traffic and people flowed past the roadside, noisy like an airport waiting for travelers from beyond the sky.

After their first reunion, there was a period when Chi Xiaoman was also always waiting alone for Chen Tong. Because Chen Tong had become very busy. So Chi Xiaoman felt that each time she waited for Chen Tong, the time was very long.

After their second reunion, Chi Xiaoman was still waiting for Chen Yue. But she didn’t feel the time was long. She looked at the little shops along the street in this city and felt that each shop’s name was adorable, like Rose Promise Auto Repair, Snow Kiss Inn, Star Grocery... She looked at them one by one and thought that Chen Yue had grown up on these cute streets and become the person she loved.

The person she loved.

When that phrase appeared, Chi Xiaoman thought it felt strange. And a little unfamiliar. As if it had come too suddenly.

That was what she thought, while also covering her face.

But she didn’t cover it for long.

Before the heat on her face had even gone down.

Chen Yue had already come back.

The street was like a very large fish tank, and the yellow lights, red taxis, green buses... all became Chen Yue’s background, blurring into indistinct patches of color beneath the contrast of her clear face.

Chi Xiaoman let out a breath.

Chen Yue walked toward her slowly, carrying something in her hand, smiling at her from far away.

Chi Xiaoman wanted the temperature on her face to go down before Chen Yue returned, so she hurriedly patted her cheeks, no longer looking at Chen Yue’s smiling eyes, and awkwardly stared at the tips of her own shoes.

Horn blasts swept past. Chen Yue came to a stop in front of her, bringing a bit of warm wind from afar, and called her softly, “Xiaoman.”

“Mm?” Chi Xiaoman looked up a little absentmindedly, pretending she hadn’t just seen Chen Yue walking over.

Chen Yue smiled at her and wanted to hand the thing in her hand over.

Chi Xiaoman was still carrying the fruit she’d bought for Chen Yue’s mother, so she reflexively reached out with her free hand to take it.

But Chen Yue suddenly wouldn’t let her.

Instead, Chen Yue moved the thing she was carrying away.

With the palm of her other hand, she took Chi Xiaoman’s outstretched hand.

Chi Xiaoman froze.

But Chen Yue tightened her grip on her as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

And led her toward the hospital.

She never let go along the way.

Summer was about to come. Chen Yue’s palm felt a little cool in her hand. But the coolness was comfortable; it didn’t make Chi Xiaoman feel cold. It did, however, make the slight heat that had just gone down on her face rise again.

Would it be strange for two women in their thirties to suddenly hold hands while walking?

For a moment, Chi Xiaoman saw two middle school students in school uniforms by the roadside. The two of them looked at their joined hands. So she quickly lowered her head and couldn’t help thinking that.

Still, even if she felt a little unaccustomed to it because of that.

She didn’t let go of Chen Yue’s hand, only followed her slowly forward.

The tips of her ears, exposed to the air, had gone a little red.

After walking for a while.

Chi Xiaoman also felt that two thirty-something adults holding hands while walking wasn’t strange at all; the fact that she had been held and then said nothing was what was stranger, and more disappointing. So she gathered her courage and found a topic that could hide that disappointment: “Sister Chen Tong, what did you go buy just now?”

As she spoke, she also instinctively looked at the plastic bag hanging from Chen Yue’s other hand.

“A few sweet-sour plum fruits,” Chen Yue explained. Then she asked, “Do you know what those are?”

“Yes.” Chi Xiaoman nodded. “I saw them at the fruit shop too. I was going to buy some.”

“Then why didn’t you?” Chen Yue asked.

“Just... I thought your mom might not be able to eat them right now.” Chi Xiaoman said that.

Chen Yue gave a quiet “Mm” and didn’t object.

Only after a while.

Did she gently ask, “Then why didn’t you buy them for yourself?”

Chi Xiaoman said nothing.

She felt unable to answer why she hadn’t thought of herself first.

So she stiffly changed the subject. “Then why did you suddenly think of buying fruit?”

Still holding Chen Yue’s hand, she scratched at her chin. “Can your mom eat this kind of fruit?”

Chen Yue turned her face to look at her for a while.

As if amused by how clumsy her attempt at changing the subject was, she said, “She can’t eat it.”

Her voice was very gentle on the street. “So I bought it for you.”

Chi Xiaoman stopped.

Chen Yue laughed at her reaction and, as if talking about something very ordinary, said to her, “When I came back just now, I passed by the fruit shop and felt like you probably hadn’t eaten fruit made this way before. I also thought you’d probably like it, so I bought you some and wanted you to try a little.”

Still holding her hand tightly, she walked the short distance very slowly and said to her simply,

“And some fried rice cakes.”

This was Chi Xiaoman’s second getting back together.

It wasn’t grand or overwhelming, and there was nothing as sensational as in a movie scene. It wasn’t the kind where two people lock eyes and then desperately run toward each other, finally embracing and kissing amid blessing-filled gazes.

It was simply sitting across from each other at a table and eating a meal, eating two candies. Afterward, Chen Yue went to buy her fried rice cakes; perhaps because she knew it was the first time bringing her back to her hometown, she lingered along the way and bought her some sweet-sour plum fruit she thought she might like.

It matched Chi Xiaoman’s depiction of the future from ten years ago almost exactly. As a result, she slept unusually well that night.

[Author’s Note]

On time with Little Neon’s sixty-fourth day [glasses][glasses][glasses][glasses]

(Today I’m not wearing sunglasses anymore)