Chapter 61

Wei Xiaolu admitted that she had already figured out a few relationship habits that worked for the moment.

Because most of the time, they were both busy: Shen Siyan was tied up with work, and Wei Xiaolu was busy job hunting. So the gaps between their busy stretches became the time she greased the wheels of their relationship.

【It’s so cold today, sis. Don’t forget to wear your hat on the way home from work!】

【I just finished a written test, and I feel amazing. I should be able to make it to the interview stage!】

【Sis, sob sob, I didn’t do well in that interview just now. I’m so sad... Please hug me】

【I want hot pot; can we go eat it together this weekend?~~~】

Sometimes Shen Siyan was in a meeting and couldn’t reply right away, but later she would always call on voice. If she worked overtime and came home late, she would buy a blueberry cake; under Wei Xiaolu’s bright cry of “Welcome home,” she would hand over that night’s gift.

“Thank you, sis,” Wei Xiaolu would say before eating, rising on tiptoe to kiss Shen Siyan’s cheek. “Love you.”

That worked remarkably well. The next day, even if Shen Siyan wasn’t working overtime, she would bring back snacks for her; as soon as she handed them over, she’d tilt her face away and wait for Wei Xiaolu to lean in on her own.

“Muah!” Wei Xiaolu kissed her with booming enthusiasm.

After the kiss, neither of them could hold it in; they doubled over against the wall, clutching their stomachs and laughing.

“Stop laughing!” Wei Xiaolu was already blushing hot with embarrassment. “You’re making my throat dry from laughing. I want milk; go get me one from the fridge.”

Yes, that’s right; she had already learned how to boss Shen Siyan around.

“Plain milk?” Shen Siyan set down her bag and walked to the fridge.

Wei Xiaolu didn’t answer. She waited until Shen Siyan’s hand touched the fridge door, then shouted, “Please choose your crush from the yogurt in front of you!”

The open fridge was packed with all kinds of yogurt, but the colors were arranged in a strangely neat pattern; the red packaging in the middle faintly formed the shape of a heart.

Wei Xiaolu had run to the supermarket three times that day just to fill the fridge, but that wasn’t the most important thing. The finale was—

Shen Siyan turned back with a smile. “Can I choose you as my crush?”

“...” Wei Xiaolu covered her face, half laughing and half helpless. “Fine, fine, choose me. Your crush wants to drink milk; help me take it out.”

Among all the assorted yogurts, there was only one bottle of plain milk. Shen Siyan reached up and took it down, but she didn’t turn around immediately.

Wei Xiaolu was hopping around in excitement, unable to stop herself from crouching by the fridge to sneak a look at Shen Siyan’s reaction.

Shen Siyan, gradually recovering from the surprise, picked up the rose that had been placed behind the bottle of milk and looked at Wei Xiaolu.

“What a beautiful flower.”

“For a beautiful you,” Wei Xiaolu said, winking at her.

Shen Siyan met her gaze and suddenly laughed.

“Why did you suddenly think of giving me flowers?” she asked, lifting a hand to pinch Wei Xiaolu’s cheek.

“Be-cause,” Wei Xiaolu patted her chest, “all my interviews are over! Ahahaha, I suddenly have nothing to do, so I wanted to express my love for you, sis.”

“Good,” Shen Siyan said, lowering her head to kiss her lips. “So all that’s left is to wait for the results, right?”

“Right.” The few companies she had interviewed with earliest had already sent rejection notices, but there were still more than a dozen applications ahead of her, and the volume of submissions was huge.

“Then you should really relax,” Shen Siyan said, placing the flowers into a vase. “After I finish this project, we’ll go skiing.”

“Okay!” Wei Xiaolu followed after her and gave Shen Siyan’s waist a hard hug.

But plans were never as dependable as change.

They didn’t get to go skiing, and Wei Xiaolu felt sorry about that too. Shen Siyan had rushed to finish the project early for her, making room for a weekend date, but she... really didn’t have the mood to go out and have fun.

Ever since the interviews ended, she had begun receiving one rejection after another.

“I’m sorry, but you did not pass the interview.”

“Your abilities do not match the requirements of our position. Thank you for your participation.”

“Thank you for your time. I believe your level will help you find a better job.”

“We’re not short on people at the moment. You can arrange other job-hunting plans.”

“Our position involves a lot of overtime and business trips; women are comparatively limited in that regard. Your resume has been entered into our talent pool, and if there’s a suitable opening, we’ll contact you again.”

...

Even the company that had once told her during the interview, “As long as you choose us, we’ll hire you,” ended up politely turning her down, saying her major wasn’t suitable.

The calm she had been forcing herself to maintain ultimately collapsed under repeated failures, crumbling into a sense of crisis as if a great building were about to fall.

Wei Xiaolu started job hunting again. During the day, she would smile at Shen Siyan and say, “It’s okay. Heaven is about to place a great burden on me, so first it must slash my job and cut off my salary. I’ll keep looking; I’ll definitely find a good job!”

But at night, once she closed the door and buried herself under the blanket, she would cry many tears and feel so miserable she couldn’t sleep.

Why was growing up not like the stories said?

When she was little, books would write that the protagonist spent a few years working hard, got into a top university, entered a leading company; with just a few words, that was all, and everything after that was a life at the summit.

But what about the disappointment, struggle, effort, and sweat that were left out? How were those stages actually endured?

Wei Xiaolu felt she should not have ended up like this.

She had worked incredibly hard just to get into T University. So many hours that Wei Jialuo had spent watching TV and playing games, she had used for solving problems and memorizing books. After entering university, she still hadn’t slacked off; she’d built a solid foundation in her major, joined competitions and won awards, and this year she had also squeezed in two internships. So why, in the end, was she still left with nothing?

Even the trashy companies she looked down on didn’t want her.

Her tears dampened half the pillow. She sniffled softly, swearing she wouldn’t cry, but the night was still so dark it frightened her; the tip of her nose went sour, squeezing out a little water that slid down from the corners of her eyes.

The day before they had agreed to go skiing, Wei Xiaolu received the final interview result. As expected, that round of applications had been completely wiped out.

Her condition was terrible. She had no desire for entertainment, and she didn’t want to be a mood-killing presence on a date with Shen Siyan. After thinking it over and over, Wei Xiaolu chose to run.

“Sis,” she said tactfully, “I’m kind of homesick. I want to go back and stay at home for two days this weekend.”

Shen Siyan was folding clothes. At the sound of her voice, her hands paused. Her expression didn’t change much; she simply lowered her eyes. “Okay. Go home and keep Uncle and Auntie company.”

“Then when we have time next week, we can go skiing,” Wei Xiaolu said as she walked over, apologetically hugging Shen Siyan and looking up at her. “Okay?”

“Okay.” Shen Siyan lowered her head and kissed the bridge of her nose, then took her hand and led her back to her room.

—On Shen Siyan’s desk sat a gift bag.

Wei Xiaolu realized it was a Christmas present only when Shen Siyan opened the box and took out a red scarf embroidered with Santa Claus and reindeer.

“I was originally going to give it to you after skiing tomorrow,” Shen Siyan said with a smile, wrapping the scarf around her neck twice. “Wear it home.”

Surrounded by the warm gift Shen Siyan had given her, Wei Xiaolu’s eyes inexplicably grew wet.

“I... forgot there was still Christmas,” she said, blaming the tears on guilt. She hadn’t prepared a Christmas gift for Shen Siyan.

“Then do you still remember New Year’s Day?” Shen Siyan asked.

Wei Xiaolu nodded repeatedly. “I’ll spend New Year’s with you.”

Shen Siyan wiped away her tears with her fingers, then cupped her face and kissed her. “But you also have to call me on Christmas, baby.”

Wei Xiaolu immediately promised her, rising on tiptoe and holding Shen Siyan’s waist to kiss her back.

It wasn’t a particularly deep kiss.

Wei Xiaolu was distracted. She realized that she didn’t devote herself to love with quite the abandon she had imagined. Without a job, facing the accomplished Shen Siyan, she felt so lacking in confidence. Aside from a verbal “love you,” she couldn’t, like Shen Siyan, casually buy expensive gifts for her girlfriend at any time, nor did she have the status or ability to solve problems for the person she loved.

What she could give Shen Siyan, compared with what Shen Siyan could give her, was nothing but a drop in the bucket.

The next day, wearing the scarf as she returned home, Tang Xiaofen praised how pretty it was. Wei Xiaolu casually said that Shen Siyan had bought it for her, and that left Tang Xiaofen stunned. After a moment, she asked, “Your CEO Shen?”

“Ah, yes,” Wei Xiaolu said awkwardly. “Her name is Shen Siyan.”

Even after hearing the full name, Tang Xiaofen still called her their boss, praising the boss for being good and attentive, and saying she should buy this and that to properly thank CEO Shen.

The more Wei Xiaolu heard, the more irritated she became. She lost control before she could stop herself.

“Can you please stop mentioning the word boss? I’m already suffering enough from not finding a job. I came back to rest; why are you bringing it up, bringing it up again!”

After she shouted that out, the house suddenly fell silent.

“What are you doing?” Wei Jialuo had taken a sugarcane stalk and bonked her on the head. “What kind of fit are you throwing?”

Wei Xiaolu hadn’t controlled herself just now; emotionally, her words had been a little harsh. Getting struck like that brought her back to her senses at once, and her whole posture deflated. She no longer had the face to face Tang Xiaofen.

The whole house was quiet for two seconds.

“Finding a job is too hard.”

As she spoke, Tang Xiaofen pushed Wei Jialuo aside. “You don’t know all the hardship your little sister’s gone through. She feels awful inside; I forgot about that. That was my fault. Hurry up and tell your dad to make a couple more dishes for Xiaolu.”

Wei Jialuo, chewing on sugarcane, reluctantly went to the kitchen.

“Mom.”

What she had just said needed an apology. After Wei Jialuo left, Wei Xiaolu sat over and leaned against Tang Xiaofen. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Tang Xiaofen said, patting her. “I get it. Once you come home, don’t think about those things.”

Even so, once the subject was raised, Wei Xiaolu still couldn’t help complaining. “I really don’t understand it. Why is it so hard to find a job these days...?”

Tang Xiaofen was very patient with her, comforting her all the while, telling her not to rush, to take her time. But Wei Xiaolu was blinded by all sorts of unfairness and was truly indignant. She slammed a fist into the sofa and angrily said, “For the same position, men can just go to one interview and get the offer!”

Tang Xiaofen sighed. “This society really is unfair.”

Thinking of Shen Siyan’s earlier suggestion at the ranch, Wei Xiaolu’s mind turned, and she started building up to it. “I hate men.”

“Exactly, they’re awful,” Tang Xiaofen agreed.

“I don’t want to marry a man. Just looking at them disgusts me,” Wei Xiaolu said, feeling a little alarmed at how much she meant it.

“Then don’t marry one,” Tang Xiaofen waved it off. “Watching some man enjoy all the benefits while you’re struggling to find a job every day is exhausting enough.”

Wei Xiaolu scratched her head, a little dazed.

So this topic could be discussed like that?

She tried again. “I could never be with a man in this lifetime.”

“It’s fine,” Tang Xiaofen said, hugging her. “We’ll raise you.”

Wei Xiaolu’s eyes started heating up again.

She let go of Tang Xiaofen, picked up a piece of sugarcane, and lowered her head to chew on it. “I’m definitely going to find a job. I still have to earn money to support you two in your old age.”

Tang Xiaofen laughed and said they didn’t need that. Then, hearing Wei Zongqing call for her, she shouted, “Coming!” and pushed all the fruit on the table toward Wei Xiaolu. “Eat some fruit first; I’m going to help your dad out for a bit.”

After Tang Xiaofen left the living room, Wei Xiaolu only then dared to reach up and wipe at her tears. But when she looked up, she saw that Wei Jialuo had somehow come back and was sitting in the corner without a word, which startled her.

“Can’t you make some noise when you come back?” Wei Xiaolu scolded through tears. “You scared me to death.”

“You’re already this hostile toward men,” Wei Jialuo said lazily, still playing his game and not bothering to look at her. “Why would I make noise? Looking for trouble?”

“...” Wei Xiaolu hadn’t meant it that way, but she didn’t feel like explaining anymore. “Fine. Then don’t make a sound. Looking at you annoys me.”

She shed two more quiet streams of tears on her own. After crying, she felt like some of the pressure had been released. She wiped her eyes, sniffled, and made a little sound; even Wei Jialuo, who was playing games, turned to look at her.

“Hey,” Wei Jialuo suddenly called.

“What?” Wei Xiaolu answered.

Wei Jialuo paused. “I’m just going to say it straight: I really don’t get why you insist on finding a job and torturing yourself like this. Worst case, just come back and open a noodle shop with me.”

“What do you know,” Wei Xiaolu muttered.

“Come on, I really don’t get it,” Wei Jialuo said, setting down his game. “If I went out and opened a little shop myself now, my time would be free, I’d just be busy around meals, and I’d still make a lot. Ten or twenty thousand a month; isn’t that way better than your lousy job making a few thousand?”

“I’m not the same as you!” Wei Xiaolu stood up in agitation.

Wei Jialuo shrugged. “It’s all just making money—”

“Not the same! Not at all!” Wei Xiaolu shouted, furious. “I studied so hard; I worked my ass off to get into a 985 school. And you want me to open a noodle shop with someone like you, who only came out of a junior college? I can’t take it!”

Wei Jialuo looked at her, silent.

Wei Zongqing and Tang Xiaofen, who had been cooking, also came out of the kitchen.

Wei Xiaolu had just finished yelling when her mind went buzzing blank. It was as if she had suddenly lost the ability to speak. But when she saw Wei Jialuo turn off his phone and stand up, walking back to the bedroom without looking at her, panic suddenly washed over her.

“Ge, I..."

Usually, squabbling and joking with Wei Jialuo was no big deal; but the tone she had just used carried a kind of subconscious arrogance.

She looked down on Wei Jialuo, disdained his relaxed comfort, and faintly envied his income. But none of that was a reason to put him down in a fit of emotion.

Wei Xiaolu didn’t even know what was wrong with her lately.

Like a car racing headlong out of control, fate no longer had its hands on the wheel; she was forced to lose control at the turning point of stepping into society.

She couldn’t bring herself to say sorry to Wei Jialuo, and that night Wei Jialuo didn’t come out to eat either. Wei Xiaolu’s mind was in complete chaos; she even forgot to call Shen Siyan. At midnight, lying in bed, she suddenly felt that she was simply a mess: she couldn’t find a job, couldn’t handle romance, and when she came home she only knew how to fight with her family.

After hesitating over and over, she decided she should at least salvage one thing.

So she picked up her phone and, with red-rimmed eyes, sent Shen Siyan a message.

【Wei Xiaolu: Sis, I got so caught up chatting with my family that I lost track of time. It’s already pretty late, so I should sleep early. I’ll call you tomorrow ^3^】

Shen Siyan replied immediately.

【Shen Siyan: See you on video tomorrow】

【Shen Siyan: Good night】

Christmas had already passed, and at that moment Wei Xiaolu remembered the scarf Shen Siyan had given her. She couldn’t remember where she had hung it. After coming home, she had apparently gotten irritated by Tang Xiaofen calling Shen Siyan “the boss” a few times, and in a reflexive fit had tossed it somewhere at random.

Wei Xiaolu got out of bed and went to look for the scarf everywhere. She searched for a long time and still couldn’t find it, and returned to the bedroom feeling especially down. When she glanced over, she saw that the scarf had been folded neatly and placed on her bedside table.