Trust

Xiao Bao wasn’t especially playful. After more than an hour of playing with Wang Ru, she remembered that Zhu Qing was waiting outside and took the initiative to say she wanted to go home.

“Did you have fun?” Zhu Qing asked.

Xiao Bao shook her head. “It was okay.”

“Then was it more fun playing with the kids here, or with the kids at kindergarten?”

Xiao Bao thought for a moment, then held up one finger and took Zhu Qing’s hand. “Zhu Zhu likes this place, so I like it too. It’s fun playing with them.”

“If we don’t count Zhu Zhu, would you rather play with Wang Ru or with your deskmate?” Zhu Qing’s voice was gentle as she repeated, “Don’t take Zhu Zhu’s preferences into account.”

Xiao Bao frowned in concentration. Children couldn’t quite separate their own feelings from other people’s; after a long while, she hesitantly said, “They’re both pretty good.”

Zhu Qing understood.

That meant Xiao Bao didn’t have any special feelings for the children at the welfare institution. She only liked them because Zhu Qing liked coming here, so Xiao Bao followed along and liked it too.

The way Xiao Bao passed her own feelings along like that, liking what Zhu Qing liked, warmed Zhu Qing from the inside out.

She picked Xiao Bao up under the arms and spun in place. “How are you so well-behaved~”

Xiao Bao was like a little goose; the moment Zhu Qing lifted her up, she went still. She was afraid of heights and thrilled at the same time, her fingers curling up quietly.

Zhu Qing ruffled Xiao Bao from head to toe, and it felt like this was the first time since losing her memory that she had truly, wholeheartedly liked this little girl.

Obedient, sensible, considerate, and able to cling to her without reservation in such pure dependence—who could resist that?

“Xiao Bao, I’m going to make you little cakes today.”

Xiao Bao: “!!! Yay!”

-

On the way back, Zhu Qing asked Qian Cancan what was going on between her and Qian Chu.

Earlier, Zhu Qing had been so busy talking about the marriage agreement that she had forgotten to ask about this.

Qian Cancan’s face scrunched up. “Nothing much. Just... like that.”

She glanced at Xiao Bao. Since the child was there, she didn’t say it outright.

But Zhu Qing understood. “Are you two compatible?”

A one-night stand, or a bed partner; on the surface, it was just mutual release, sex without love. But Zhu Qing knew Qian Cancan wasn’t that kind of person, and Qian Chu was even less likely to go along with it.

“Let’s leave it for now,” Qian Cancan said, sounding a little defeated. “It’s a mess. I can’t be bothered to dig into it.”

Zhu Qing said, “Is it because Qian Chu doesn’t want to?”

Qian Cancan shook her head. “I didn’t ask.”

“...” Zhu Qing looked at her, equal parts exasperated and disbelieving. “And you have the nerve to call me a coward.”

As expected of best friends, this habit of turning into ostriches whenever they ran into a problem really did run in the family.

Qian Cancan blew up. “I’m not married! I’m completely free and clear; how can I be the same as you?”

Zhu Qing said flatly, “What’s the difference? You’re both dating. Isn’t it all the same?”

Seeing that they weren’t going to get anywhere, Zhu Qing held out a hand. “I’ll ask you one thing. Do you actually like Qian Chu?”

Qian Cancan looked at the road ahead and didn’t answer.

From the back seat, Xiao Bao said, “Aunt Qian Chu likes Aunt Cancan.”

Zhu Qing blinked. “How does Xiao Bao know that?”

“Aunt Qian Chu said so before. She thinks Aunt Cancan is pretty,” Xiao Bao said. “I also like pretty aunties, but I feel like Zhu Zhu is the prettiest. Mama said that because I like Zhu Zhu, I think Zhu Zhu is the prettiest. Mama also thinks Zhu Zhu is the prettiest.”

The corner of Zhu Qing’s mouth lifted slightly; she felt an inexplicable sense that she had come out ahead.

Qian Cancan was embarrassed. “Xiao Bao, you misunderstood your Aunt Qian Chu. She was just being polite.”

“Nope. She secretly set Aunt Cancan’s photo as her wallpaper. I’ve seen it several times.”

“That was because of a bet once. She lost, and I made her set it.”

Zhu Qing asked, “How long did you make her keep it?”

Qian Cancan thought about it. “Just that day.”

The moment she said it, the car fell into collective silence.

Qian Cancan only belatedly realized that Qian Chu had kept the wallpaper this whole time; otherwise, how could Xiao Bao have seen it every single time?

“One wallpaper proves nothing. Maybe my beauty shocked her so much that she just has decent taste.” Qian Cancan refused to admit defeat.

“Cancan, use your head a little,” Zhu Qing said. “If the two of you really aren’t compatible, then stop dragging it out. All that nonsense about sleeping together without feelings is fake. If you like her, just say so. It’s better for both of you.”

Qian Cancan looked thoughtful, but she still complained, “You’re one to talk. Aren’t you confused too? Why do you have to force me to make a decision?”

“How am I confused?” Zhu Qing said unhappily. “Li Lan and I are truly in love.”

“Then I’m truly not in love with Qian Chu, either,” Qian Cancan snorted. “There’s a wall between us. We’ll talk about it later.”

Seeing that she couldn’t be persuaded, Zhu Qing frowned and lowered her voice. “You’ve already slept with her. Don’t be irresponsible; I look down on you.”

Hearing this, Qian Cancan took advantage of a red light to hook a finger at Zhu Qing, motioning her closer, then whispered, “Tell me, if I gave her a sum of money as compensation, would that be appropriate?”

Zhu Qing: ...

“I think Qian Chu may not always speak pleasantly,” Zhu Qing said fairly, “but she doesn’t deserve that.”

Qian Cancan panicked. “That won’t work either, and this won’t work either; you’re not allowed to talk anymore!”

Zhu Qing silently mourned for Qian Chu and indeed said no more.

These ridiculous little couples. Still, she and Li Lan were better; they were tangled up, affectionate, and clearly fond of each other at first glance. They had obviously matched right away, sparing themselves all these troubles.

...Though maybe not necessarily.

Zhu Qing could only be certain that she had fallen in love with Li Lan at first sight, then fallen deeper the second time, and by the third time had wanted to sleep with her.

As for Li Lan and herself... Zhu Qing wasn’t so sure.

That was Li Lan.

Right from the beginning, Zhu Qing couldn’t figure out why Li Lan would actually be with her. Although Qian Cancan had explained it, and Li Lan had said some sweet, cloying things too, Zhu Qing still had no memory of them being together; naturally, she couldn’t tell what was really going on with this contract marriage.

At this point, only Li Lan could tell her.

After they got home, Xiao Bao was a little tired. The nanny took her to wash up and nap, while Zhu Qing went to the bedroom.

Li Lan was applying a face mask. When she saw Zhu Qing come in, she sat up and peeled it off. “You’re back?”

“Keep putting it on,” Zhu Qing said.

“It was already done anyway.” Li Lan tossed the mask onto her knee. “How was today?”

Zhu Qing smiled. “You go first. Can Director Yang help Xiao Bao get into Q School?”

Li Lan’s tone was light, and she didn’t seem very interested. “Yes.”

Zhu Qing glanced at her expression. “Any conditions?”

Li Lan shook her head. “No conditions.”

Zhu Qing laughed. “Then why do you look so unhappy?”

Li Lan wore her emotions plainly on her face; her dark, clear eyes were slightly lowered, and her lips were pressed together. She looked miserable from head to toe.

“I was thinking about Yan Jin.”

Zhu Qing froze.

Li Lan said quietly, “I tried to trick Yang Huayi today and found out she and Yan Jin had been lovers for a period of time.”

Zhu Qing didn’t know what to say. She knew Li Lan actually didn’t approve much of the path Yan Jin had chosen, but she still cared about her; otherwise, she wouldn’t have been willing to raise Xiao Bao so wholeheartedly, and she wouldn’t have felt conflicted enough to leave Xiao Bao with such a sense of insecurity.

“Maybe the two of them really liked each other?” Zhu Qing walked over and sat beside her, trying to comfort her.

Li Lan sounded depressed. “Yan Jin had a warm exterior but a cold interior. She seemed gentle, but she was actually very hard to truly like anyone. Becoming someone else’s lover was probably her way of securing a slightly easier future for herself. As for Yang Huayi, ha. How could someone like her possibly have real feelings?”

“Then they were just two people using each other,” Zhu Qing immediately changed her tune. “Getting what they needed.”

Li Lan’s hand suddenly clenched, and her voice carried a hint of hatred. “Even if they were just using each other, Yan Jin would absolutely have been the one who suffered more.”

Closeness and distance mattered; of course Li Lan would lean toward Yan Jin.

Zhu Qing wrapped her arms around Li Lan’s waist, her tone growing even gentler. “Then now, Director Yang helping Xiao Bao with school counts as her making up for Yan Jin, doesn’t it?”

Li Lan gave a cold snort. “If I could get Xiao Bao into Q School without needing Yang Huayi, I really wouldn’t want her to notice Xiao Bao at all.”

“Everything’s in the past,” Zhu Qing soothed softly. “Now we’re family. We’ll only get better and better from here.”

Zhu Qing’s gentle words eased some of the coldness from Li Lan’s expression. She came back to herself and looked at Zhu Qing.

“And you? Did you have a good time at the welfare institution?”

Zhu Qing hesitated for two seconds, then shook her head. “I don’t know if I should even say this, but I found out some things.”

Li Lan pressed, “What things?”

Zhu Qing looked at Li Lan, all the way into her eyes.

Li Lan didn’t understand. “...Can’t you tell me?”

“It’s not that I can’t,” Zhu Qing said, her gaze shifting as she took Li Lan’s hand. “I just didn’t tell you about these things before. I think I must have had my own reasons. But now that I’m starting over with you, I think the most important thing between two people is trust.”

Li Lan’s eyes flickered. Hearing Zhu Qing say she had hidden things from her before, Li Lan wasn’t surprised.

Everyone had their own secrets, or rather, things that couldn’t really be called secrets; just past events they didn’t want to bring up in advance. Zhu Qing had them, and so did she.

Li Lan hadn’t expected Zhu Qing to choose to tell her.

“Go on.”

Zhu Qing spoke softly. “I’ve been supporting the Xiyuan Welfare Institution for a long time. Not just financially; I also often go there to teach and work.”

Li Lan looked slightly puzzled, but soon nodded.

Unexpected, but also reasonable.

Zhu Qing really did pay more attention than most people to these vulnerable groups.

Probably because she lacked care when she was little. Zhu Qing was almost a kind of de facto orphan; she had parents, but they were rarely home. Growing up alone, she naturally developed an imagined tenderness for the children in these institutions.

But that was only imagined tenderness.

Li Lan made no comment on Zhu Qing’s actions. “Mm. Anything else?”

Zhu Qing felt a little embarrassed. She bit the inside of her cheek and said with some difficulty, “Actually, my identity as a kindergarten assistant was a front. I’m a top foreign-language graduate from a university. The main reason I took that three-thousand-yuan-a-month job was because it was close to the welfare institution, and the work was easy with lots of free time.”

Saying it out loud was a little awkward. Zhu Qing had seen plenty of married couples where one side claimed the company had forced overtime and stayed out late, dumping the children and all the housework on the other side.

But Li Lan also traveled frequently; Zhu Qing wasn’t exactly slacking off. Still, it had been hidden from her, and Zhu Qing didn’t sound very confident. “Sorry.”

This time, Li Lan stayed silent for a long while.

Zhu Qing said, “Are you angry? I’m sorry.”

Li Lan’s eyes moved as she looked at Zhu Qing.

Slowly, she shook her head, her expression dazed. “I just didn’t expect that to be the reason.”

At the banquet where she and Zhu Qing first met, after the two of them had slept together, Zhu Qing had run off because she was embarrassed. Li Lan had sent people to look for her, but before they could find her, she ran into Zhu Qing again at Xiao Bao’s kindergarten.

She had assumed Zhu Qing had taken that job for her sake; Zhu Qing had feelings for her, and Li Lan herself had already secretly loved Zhu Qing for many years. Not wanting to wait any longer, she had proactively suggested a contract marriage.

She’d never expected that Zhu Qing hadn’t taken the kindergarten job because of her at all; it was just that the work was relatively easy, and it also made it convenient for her to look after the children at the welfare institution.

Li Lan shook her head. “I’m not angry. I just suddenly understood. So that’s why you were so tired before.”

Then Li Lan’s expression turned serious. “And after this? Will you keep helping them?”

Zhu Qing had thought this through carefully. She answered with care, “Today I ran into the head of the welfare institution. She hid the fact that I’d donated money, and even made up a story that I’d once promised to donate more. She asked me for money, but couldn’t even say where the money I’d already donated had gone... I’m planning to watch and see for a while before deciding.”

Li Lan let out a breath of relief; a sharpness appeared in her features.

“I can understand why you hid this from me. I remember you once mentioned the welfare institution to me before.” Li Lan paused, then said in a low voice, “My attitude was very clear: I rejected it and wanted to stay away from it. I didn’t want you paying attention to it, so I can’t really blame you for hiding it from me.”

If Zhu Qing hadn’t understood Li Lan’s thoughts before, she could see some of them clearly now.

The tragedy of orphans was never caused by one single person alone, and charitable work wasn’t as simple as giving money and supplies. Li Lan had grown up in a welfare institution herself; she knew all the filth and mess inside it, so it was only natural that she would want to avoid it.

Zhu Qing said, “No matter what, I was wrong to hide it from you before.”

Word by word, clearly and earnestly, Zhu Qing said, “Li Lan, I’m willing to tell you everything now. That’s my trust in you.”

Warmth spread through Li Lan’s heart. She gave a soft “Mm.” “I’m very happy.”

Zhu Qing looked at her and said quietly, “Then you? Is there anything you want to tell me?”

Zhu Qing’s gaze was very light, without the slightest trace of pressure; it landed on Li Lan’s eyelashes like a warm feather.

Li Lan’s lashes trembled slightly. She averted her gaze, her expression freezing almost imperceptibly.

Zhu Qing said, “Is there?”

After a long moment, Li Lan lifted her head.

Her clear, shimmering eyes and slightly cool features formed a beauty so striking under the light that it was almost breathtaking.

She said, “No.”

————————!!————————

Zhu Qing: I'm watching you.

Thanks for everyone’s concern; I love you all [heart][dog holding rose][dog holding rose][dog holding rose]