Chapter 43

Around seven-thirty in the evening, a sizable crowd had gathered at the foot of the mountain. They carried flashlights and called out Kong Xiyan's name.

Even Xiaopang and the others had come to join the commotion, but their families shooed them back home.

Chi Wanzhao's face was taut, her lips pressed into a thin line. She took the flashlight from Wang Haining's hand and said, "I'll go in and find her."

Wang Haining grabbed her arm. "Let me go instead. I know this mountain better than you."

Chi Wanzhao pulled her hand away.

Even if she didn't know it well, she had to go find her herself.

The thought of Kong Xiyan alone in the deep mountains, especially with her terrible sense of direction, made her heart twist in knots. Not just returning home—even standing at the foot of this mountain was torture.

Wang Haining saw her stubbornness and sighed helplessly. "Fine, let's go together."

The other villagers were ready too. Chen Junshan handed out sticks to everyone and took the lead at the front, calling out as he walked, "Teacher Kong!"

"Teacher Kong!"

"Xiyan!"

But each call went unanswered. The cold wind stung their faces. Chi Wanzhao had no time to watch her footing; she just wanted to push forward. Once they entered, the group split into pairs. Naturally, Chi Wanzhao walked with Wang Haining.

After about half an hour, Wang Haining said, "Don't worry. Xiyan will be fine. I remember the first time she came up the mountain to chop firewood, she couldn't find her way back. Later, she hid in a cave. When we found her, she was leaning against the cave wall, fast asleep."

"She even said that if we hadn't found her, she'd have made her own way down the next morning."

Chi Wanzhao's expression didn't soften at her words. Instead, it grew even darker, the sharpness between her brows impossible to hide, her gaze cold as frost.

She and Wang Haining kept heading deeper into the mountain. Occasionally, at the rustle of wind or grass, she would stare at the spot for a while, only moving on once she confirmed no one was there. Further up, the path forked. Wang Haining pointed to one of the trails and said, "Let's go this way together. We can come back and check the other later."

Chi Wanzhao shook her head. "You take that path; I'll take this one."

This was the first sentence she'd spoken since learning Kong Xiyan had gone up the mountain. Her voice was hoarse and rough. Her face was pale, her hands gripped the flashlight tightly, and the veins on the back of her hands stood out. Tension held her as taut as her beautiful features.

Wang Haining said, "Alright. If you don't find her, follow this path back."

"You can wait for me here."

Chi Wanzhao hummed in acknowledgment and left.

The mountain path at night was hard to traverse—she'd known that since her first visit to Changning Village. But back then, she'd had Kong Xiyan by her side, so it hadn't seemed difficult.

Now, rushing forward in a panic, she tripped over tree branches several times. After about ten minutes, her originally clean down jacket was covered in mud, dirty patches layered one after another. She walked quickly, her eyes scanning around with the flashlight, paying no attention to herself.

In the dead of winter, the whole mountain was eerily quiet. Occasionally, she could still hear a distant "Teacher Kong." Chi Wanzhao strode forward with big steps.

Deeper and deeper.

Until there was no path ahead. She stood at the edge of the trees and grass, calling toward the steep peak, "Xiyan!"

There was no answer.

Her already dim eyes darkened further. After calling out, she pressed her lips together, her eye rims slightly reddened. The wind howled past her ears, but it stirred no reaction.

Just as she was about to turn back, a faint voice drifted through the air: "Yanyan? Are you there?"

Chi Wanzhao's eyes lit up instantly. She strained her ears—the faint sound came from where the path ended. She shone her flashlight over there; the withered grass was tall, reaching up to her waist, completely obscuring Kong Xiyan from view.

As she moved forward, she called out, "Kong Xiyan?"

"Xiyan?"

Still no answer.

The air was so still that the call she'd just heard seemed like a hallucination.

But she knew it wasn't.

Kong Xiyan was here.

She could feel it.

Chi Wanzhao pressed on. The path grew rougher. Though it hadn't rained in days, the cold wind and freezing air had loosened the mountain soil. Walking on it made clumps of dirt crumble and fall.

Her calls seemed swallowed by the darkness, showing not a glimmer of light.

After climbing for about four or five minutes, she could hear Kong Xiyan's voice clearly. It was thin and reedy, as if she were afraid of disturbing something, cautious and careful.

Just as she climbed up a small slope, she saw Kong Xiyan, bent at the waist.

Chi Wanzhao let out a sigh of relief. She walked over, pulled Kong Xiyan up, and hugged her fiercely, trembling from her body to her soul. She buried her face deep in Kong Xiyan's neck, her teeth chattering as she said, "I thought—I thought I'd lost you again."

Her voice was hoarse. She gripped Kong Xiyan's shoulders tightly, pressing her hard against her chest.

But the person in her arms didn't react. Chi Wanzhao slowly released Kong Xiyan and met her eyes. Seeing that she wasn't looking at her, she called, "Xiyan?"

Kong Xiyan flinched back as if startled, then slowly raised her eyes and looked at Chi Wanzhao with suspicion. Quickly dropping her gaze, she said, "Mi—Miss Chi..."

"I'm sorry. Yanyan is gone."

"I searched for so long but couldn't find her. She must still be playing hide-and-seek with me, just like Queen. You don't know, Queen loved playing hide-and-seek with me back then. Every time, I had to search for ages before finding her."

With each word Kong Xiyan spoke, Chi Wanzhao's expression darkened a degree. In the end, even Kong Xiyan noticed her mood. She shrank her shoulders and said, "Don't worry, Miss Chi. I'll find Yanyan. I definitely will."

Chi Wanzhao pulled her close by the shoulders. "Xiyan, Yanyan is found. She's at home. She wasn't playing hide-and-seek with you. She's at home, safe and sound."

As she spoke, she patted Kong Xiyan's back, her voice gentle.

Kong Xiyan slowly calmed down in her embrace, still cautious in manner. "Really? And what about Queen? Is Queen with Yanyan?"

Chi Wanzhao opened her mouth but said nothing.

Kong Xiyan's pupils contracted, her face pale. Trembling at the corners of her lips, she said, "Chi Wanzhao, did I kill Queen?"

"It was me—I insisted on going out that day. It was my fault I didn't watch Queen properly. It was my fault I didn't watch over my dad..."

Seeing her on the verge of losing it, Chi Wanzhao grabbed her shoulders and shook her, shouting, "Kong Xiyan! Listen to me! You didn't kill Queen! You didn't kill your dad! You didn't kill anyone! Do you hear me!"

It was rare for her to shout, but it completely stunned Kong Xiyan.

Their eyes met, complex emotions churning in both their gazes.

Chi Wanzhao tightened her embrace, and Kong Xiyan threw herself into her arms, sobbing her heart out, utterly devastated.

Three years.

When her father left, she hadn't cried.

When she learned Queen had been hit by a car, she hadn't cried either.

She'd thought she'd long moved past these things, that even facing those who'd hurt her again, she could stay composed.

She hadn't expected that something as simple as Yanyan going missing would unearth the pain buried deep inside her.

In the end, she had truly overestimated herself.

Kong Xiyan cried in Chi Wanzhao's arms for a very, very long time, until she cried herself to sleep.

Worried about her condition, Chi Wanzhao draped Kong Xiyan's arms over her own shoulders, cupped her buttocks, and hoisted her up, settling her steadily on her back.

The way down was even harder than the way up.

Especially this stretch of mountain path that offered no footing.

Chi Wanzhao walked with utmost care, worried about Kong Xiyan's body and afraid that hurrying might cause an accident. Just as her mind was in turmoil, her foot slipped, and she rolled down the steep slope beside her.

She tried to turn over and shield Kong Xiyan, but the descent was too fast. When she grabbed Kong Xiyan's wrist and pulled her into her arms, she felt the sensation of weightlessness, and then both of them tumbled into a pit.

Chi Wanzhao's back hit the soft earth hard, and Kong Xiyan crashed straight into her. She let out a muffled groan.

Fortunately, the pit was full of grass, and the soil was soft. They'd only rolled a few times; the fall hadn't done any serious harm.

Chi Wanzhao pulled out her phone from her down jacket's pocket—no signal.

The wind was biting cold. Her flashlight had been lost during the tumble. Now she used the light from her phone as a makeshift flashlight, shining it around. The pit appeared about three people deep. It had likely served some purpose in the past, but now the bottom was covered with weeds, and the soil was very loose. If it weren't for that, given the height, a fall like that might have cost them their lives.

She propped Kong Xiyan against one side, then stood at the bottom and tried to climb the pit walls with her hands. The loose soil crumbled down, landing on her clothes and hair. She stepped back a couple of paces and called out, "Is anyone there?"

"Brother Shan!"

"Wang Haining!"

Her voice was already hoarse and cracked. After calling out a few names, she coughed hard. The only response was the mournful howl of the wind.

She didn't summon Chen Junshan or Wang Haining, but she did rouse Kong Xiyan.

The woman leaning against the pit wall stirred, then raised her right hand to her head with a soft whimper. Chi Wanzhao heard the sound, turned quickly, squatted down, and shone her phone light on Kong Xiyan. "Awake?"

Kong Xiyan shielded her eyes with one hand. "Move it away."

Chi Wanzhao saw that her expression had returned to normal and breathed a sigh of relief.

She picked the grass off Kong Xiyan's head, straightened her body, and asked, "Can you get up? Did you hurt anything from the fall?"

Kong Xiyan didn't get up. She was silent for a while before speaking. "Miss Chi, about earlier... thank you."

She hadn't expected to be so fragile, to spiral from Yanyan's absence into thoughts of Queen and her father, wandering aimlessly in the mountains for half the day. Just thinking about it made her feel embarrassed.

Chi Wanzhao pressed her lips together and sat down beside her.

Some heartaches, the longer they stay buried, the more terrifying they become when they finally erupt.

Luckily, hers had only been hidden for three years—not that long. Now that she'd vented, she should feel much better.

Kong Xiyan did feel much better inside. The suppressed pain seemed to have vanished with that torrent of tears.

She let out a soft breath.

The two sat shoulder to shoulder. Kong Xiyan asked, "Miss Chi, where are Haining and the others?"

Chi Wanzhao said, "They're looking for you on the other side of the mountain."

Hearing that, Kong Xiyan grew anxious. She tried to stand up, letting out a hiss of pain. Chi Wanzhao quickly rose and supported her. "What's wrong?"

"I twisted my ankle."

...

Helpless, Chi Wanzhao sighed and helped her sit down again. Kong Xiyan grabbed Chi Wanzhao's phone, and the sudden vibration nearly made her throw it. Then she realized—someone was calling!

There was signal here after all!

Her eyes lit up in the glow of the phone screen. She quickly handed it to Chi Wanzhao. "Is it Haining?"

Chi Wanzhao took the phone, glanced at the number, and confirmed it was Wang Haining, whose contact she'd just exchanged. She answered.

Wang Haining's voice was urgent. "Did you find Xiyan? We haven't found her anywhere here..."

Chi Wanzhao cut her off. "Found her. Keep walking straight along the path I took. We're trapped in a pit and can't get out."

Wang Haining thought for a moment. "Got it. Stay put. We're on our way."

The call clicked off.

Chi Wanzhao figured it would take Wang Haining and the others a while to reach them, so she sat down against Kong Xiyan.

All was silent; they could only hear the wind howling. Looking up, the moonlight was blocked by the trees, indistinct.

Afraid her phone battery would die, Chi Wanzhao turned off the light and leaned close to Kong Xiyan.

The wind didn't reach them here, but still the two huddled together, as if sharing warmth. Kong Xiyan's long hair had come loose, a few strands brushing against Chi Wanzhao's cheek, carrying a familiar faint fragrance.

Under the night, in pitch darkness, Chi Wanzhao turned to look at Kong Xiyan. Her hands slowly clenched, and she shifted her body closer. She spoke softly, "Miss Kong, look at tonight's moon. Don't you have anything to say to me?"

Kong Xiyan looked up, dazed, and glanced at the moon, which was hidden by the trees. After a moment's thought, she asked, "Say what?"

Chi Wanzhao stared at her profile, unable to resist leaning forward, her hand propped on the dead grass. "How about we talk about last night..."

Kong Xiyan still had her head tilted, her brows slightly furrowed as if in thought. Hearing Chi Wanzhao's words, she interrupted, "Last night? After you went back, you threw up all over my bed. You don't know what that smelled like..."

Chi Wanzhao's hand slipped, and half her body sank into the loose soil. Dirt immediately poured into her clothes.

She gritted her teeth. "You'd better shut up!"

Kong Xiyan looked a bit aggrieved. "Oh..."