Chapter 23: Wushan, Don’t Be Born
Hearing the words “abusing power for personal gain,” Xue Erbai’s brow twitched hard. A little weakly, she said, “H-how could that be?”
“At most, it’s just… taking it on credit…”
“I’ll pay it back tomorrow!”
Only with that last sentence did she regain a bit of momentum.
Just kidding.
The whole snack shop belonged to Miaomiao anyway! And as for the fruit, that had been decided after a meeting; it was specially supplied for the production team.
Most importantly… if she hadn’t brought it back, those fruits would have gone bad anyway, because they simply couldn’t sell that much.
When she left, she’d hesitated over and over before deciding to take this box of cherries home; and she’d already planned to tell Qiao You tonight that they needed to cut back on the fruit supply.
She briefly explained all of this to Ji Wushan.
By then, the person who had been squatting had moved to sit by her feet.
Then she heard, “Hah.”
Ji Wushan let out a short laugh. Xue Erbai looked up a little awkwardly and saw Ji Wushan bend down to ask, “Take it on credit…?”
“Mm, that’s…” Xue Erbai lowered her head.
There was still a trace of amusement at the corners of Ji Wushan’s mouth; it was genuinely novel to hear such words coming out of Xue Erbai’s mouth.
Clearly it was her own family’s business, and participating in the show could even bring some exposure, yet she had made this “Xue-zong” act like this.
“You… don’t look at me like that. I really will pay it back.”
“And besides, I really did it for Miaomiao’s sake. What if all that fruit goes bad? If I couldn’t bring it back, I probably would’ve taken even more.”
“I’m not looking at you like anything. I just think you’re kind of… cute?”
“Huh??”
“This way?!"
This was probably… the first time she’d ever heard a word of praise from Ji Wushan.
Though what she wanted to hear was something like pretty, charming, sexy, cool and handsome…
But cute was nice too.
Her movements turned a little impulsive; bubbles rose in her heart, and she almost sprang up from the floor in disbelief, asking Ji Wushan, “You really think I’m cute?”
Only after asking did she realize just how close they were.
Ji Wushan was already bent forward. Even though Xue Erbai had consciously tried to support herself against the chair beneath Ji Wushan, it was still far too close.
She took a deep breath and slowly let go of the hand bracing her, leaning back little by little…
But in her field of vision, Ji Wushan suddenly widened her eyes and reached out to grab her collar. Xue Erbai panicked too, her hand fully letting go as she caught Ji Wushan’s slender waist.
The carpet was soft; her waist was soft.
Even the lips pressed against her collarbone were unbearably soft.
Xue Erbai tilted her head back, staring blankly at the ceiling.
She didn’t dare move. She could only repeat the thought in her heart again.
Ugh… her collarbone really was so sensitive!!!
It wasn’t the first time Xue Erbai had realized this. During those few intimate moments with Ji Wushan, she had occasionally been touched there by Ji Wushan’s cool fingertips, or brushed by her lips as her breath rose and fell.
But emotion was always stirred by Ji Wushan’s panting, and the numb tingling always vanished in an instant.
Now, though, they were only holding each other.
After hesitating for a long while, Xue Erbai lifted herself slightly and took the initiative to rub her lips against Ji Wushan’s, murmuring coquettishly, “Wifey, the place you touched me is so sensitive.”
“You used to…”
“You used to know how to take care of me.”
After saying that, Xue Erbai’s cheek was almost hidden in Ji Wushan’s hair.
Her heart thundered.
Because that line was partly fake.
She really was sensitive, very sensitive; but how could Ji Wushan possibly know how to take care of her?!
If it weren’t for the fact that Ji Wushan had lost her memory, Xue Erbai wouldn’t even dare crash into her arms like this.
Time passed second by second. Xue Erbai felt the hand loosely supporting her waist tighten; the rubbing between her collarbone and lips gradually grew more intense.
Xue Erbai’s breathing trembled. She wrapped an arm around Ji Wushan’s back, turned herself over, and stared at those mottled red lips.
Then she unconsciously looked down at her own collarbone.
There, Ji Wushan’s lipstick had been left behind.
Ji Wushan followed her gaze too. Her cheeks reddened a little, and she bit her lip before turning her face away.
But Xue Erbai was smiling, as if the two of them ought to be this close. Her body pressed in even more…
So close that Ji Wushan became uncomfortable and let out a soft “mm,” her face flushing red. She turned her head aside and said, “Xue Erbai, you… you’re pressing on me.”
Xue Erbai didn’t react at first; only after a while did she understand, and lowered her gaze.
The two of them were pressed together, and her own fullness was resting against Ji Wushan’s arm.
She felt regret. Why couldn’t they have been a little more centered?!
The thought had just surfaced when Xue Erbai’s ears turned red too…
She couldn’t help but despise herself in her heart!
How could she be like this? First she made Ji Wushan “take care of” her, and then… then she went and pressed into her!
Xue Erbai hurriedly got up, panic seeping into her tone as though she were afraid of being caught in the act. She forced herself to stay calm and explained, “Sorry, sorry… I didn’t notice.”
Ji Wushan’s eyes darkened a little. She felt Xue Erbai’s apology was far too proper.
Turning her head away, she pulled free the arm that had been pressed beneath her and loosely circled it around Xue Erbai’s waist, with a kind of indulgence even she herself hadn’t noticed.
Xue Erbai’s heart went wild again.
Ji Wushan’s fingertips were clearly cool, yet they were no less sensitive to her than her collarbone, making her whole chest burn.
Testing the waters, she edged a little closer to Ji Wushan again. This time she was obedient, moving gently; she only leaned in a tiny bit, her nose brushing Ji Wushan’s ear as she said in a soft, sticky voice, “Wifey, would that… hurt a lot?”
She deliberately didn’t say where it would hurt, nor why.
But the ambiguous atmosphere circled between them. Ji Wushan’s ear was swept by her warm breath; it felt a little itchy.
Ji Wushan put her hand down, turned slightly, and looked Xue Erbai in the eye. Her voice was very light as she said, “It doesn’t hurt.” Then she asked politely, “Can you get up now?”
Xue Erbai didn’t answer. She just braced one hand beside Ji Wushan’s cheek and sat up smoothly.
Ji Wushan’s gaze happened to land on the collarbone that had been rubbed red by her.
She lifted a hand and said, a little uncertainly, “I… should I wipe it off for you?”
“Okay!” Xue Erbai immediately nodded and grabbed her hand, pressing it against her own collarbone.
But Ji Wushan’s hand trembled a little; she hadn’t expected Xue Erbai’s collarbone to be so hot.
She almost pulled her hand back.
Xue Erbai didn’t give her the chance, lightly placing her hand in Ji Wushan’s tiger’s mouth and lifting herself a little.
Open and cooperative.
Ji Wushan blanked out for a moment.
Only after a belated realization did she understand how absurd this all was.
She found Xue Erbai cute, and when she heard her soft-spoken coaxing, she couldn’t control the urge to indulge her.
Her hand had even rested on Xue Erbai’s waist; her palm had almost been pressed flat against it.
These things were hard for Ji Wushan to imagine.
At least in her understanding, they were difficult to do; but the loss of memory also left her lacking confidence.
She lowered her head and hurriedly wiped Xue Erbai clean, then quickly stood up and left a line behind her: “I’m going to take a shower.”
With that, she turned and headed for the bathroom.
-
Warm water soaked Ji Wushan’s hair and slid down her shoulders; she looked sideways into the misty mirror.
The figure reflected there was lean, but not thin; just the right kind of well-proportioned.
She gradually drifted off, unconsciously beginning to compare herself with Xue Erbai’s build.
Her shoulders weren’t as open and smooth as Xue Erbai’s.
But her waist was finer, and her lines were slimmer and softer.
In every way, she and Xue Erbai were different types.
Ji Wushan had never liked herself; she hadn’t liked herself since she was young.
On the other hand, she was a little envious of Xue Erbai; in fact, she was a little envious of Xue Erbai.
Even their faces were like that.
She loathed her own appearance.
Especially those eyes; she despised them to the extreme.
But the confusion that had now settled over her only made her even more flustered.
Her hand moved down from her collarbone; beyond her figure, she was also unconsciously comparing… Xue Erbai’s softness.
The same, yet not the same.
“Senior Sister Shenshen, did you forget your bath towel?”
Ji Wushan, standing before the mirror, jumped in surprise. Her cheeks flushed hot; her hand dropped quickly, and she looked around.
After confirming she hadn’t brought a bath towel, she answered in a trembling voice, “I forgot.”
“Hand it to me.”
Her voice trembled because she had been showering too long. But when Xue Erbai opened the door a little and handed her the towel, she trembled even more.
“This… this isn’t my towel.”
Her towel was pure white; what Xue Erbai handed over was… pink.
It was obviously not hers.
She instinctively wanted to refuse, but Xue Erbai’s muffled voice came through: “I couldn’t find yours. This one is clean; I haven’t used it yet.”
“And we’re husband and wife.”
“There aren’t any cameras in the room right now, either.”
Xue Erbai didn’t say she couldn’t refuse, but every sentence left Ji Wushan with nowhere to argue.
And suddenly, she found herself thinking the same as she had when she’d unconsciously indulged Xue Erbai earlier.
By the time she came back to her senses, the towel was already in her hand and the door had shut tightly.
---
After Xue Erbai walked into the bathroom with the matching pink towel, Ji Wushan sat down in front of the dressing table and closed her eyes.
Time in her mind grew very slow, and even the faint sounds seemed amplified.
The place she had just showered in was now where Xue Erbai was showering.
It was a little unbearable; she bit lightly at her lip.
She didn’t know how long had passed before Xue Erbai pushed the door open. Eyes still tightly shut, Ji Wushan hurriedly pulled the blanket up.
Her breathing unconsciously grew heavier; her heartbeat sped up too.
Xue Erbai showered faster than Ji Wushan. By the time Ji Wushan had just finished drying her hair and changed into her nightdress, Xue Erbai had already walked out.
Her nightdress was very short, barely covering her thighs; she walked out in plain sight.
She squeezed up beside Ji Wushan, the damp strands of hair brushing against her arm.
Ji Wushan couldn’t help but shiver; Xue Erbai, however, seemed completely unaware as she turned on the hair dryer…
The whirring sound made Ji Wushan’s heart even less calm, and the scent of lime seemed to drift in with the breeze.
Even the lighting was overly bright, forcing her to clearly see the bed they were about to share.
Even though they had already lain together for a nap at noon, and had even done so a few times before, she still felt uneasy.
The sound of Xue Erbai drying her hair was very clear, the sound of sitting on the bed was clear too, and even the scent of lime grew stronger and stronger…
She curled into the corner of the bed. A few minutes later, the mattress sank beside her.
Only the bedside lamp remained on; Xue Erbai lay down beside her and stretched out, her foot touching Ji Wushan’s leg.
Ji Wushan suddenly bit her lip hard and grabbed at Xue Erbai from under the blanket.
She didn’t want Xue Erbai to move anymore.
Who would have thought Xue Erbai was very restless? The moment Ji Wushan touched her, all that softness rushed into her hand. Ji Wushan jerked her hand back sharply and stared at her.
Suddenly, blurry fragments flashed through her mind.
It was… a fragment of her wrapping her arms around Xue Erbai’s neck and pressing her down beneath her.
Xue Erbai also wore that same innocent expression as she looked at her.
Her red lips parted as she welcomed her kiss…
The fragment wasn’t clear, but it was enough for her to know what they had been doing.
Possessed by some strange impulse, Ji Wushan lifted her hand that had just touched Xue Erbai and looked at it.
Her nails were round, but a little long.
It was not suitable for anything to happen.
And Xue Erbai looked over at her hand too. A little unable to figure out what was wrong with Ji Wushan, she pinched her fingers and asked, “Does your hand hurt again?”
During the car accident, Ji Wushan’s finger bones had fractured. Although she’d been treated for more than half a month and was basically fine now, lately she had been working, and that was nothing like resting. Xue Erbai guessed she was uncomfortable again.
She looked her over from all angles, waiting for an answer.
Ji Wushan didn’t answer, but her tightly held body leaned back against the headboard.
The other hand hidden under the blanket clenched tightly, her palm sweaty.
She was glad Xue Erbai had not asked the right question; otherwise she wouldn’t even know how to answer.
Yet beyond the relief, there was also a trace of disappointment she herself hadn’t expected.
Her gaze was still fixed on Xue Erbai’s lips, watching them open and close as she asked whether her fingers hurt, whether any other wounds hurt.
Suddenly annoyed, she raised a hand and gently covered Xue Erbai’s mouth. Her voice deliberately turned a little cold as she said, “It doesn’t hurt. It’s fine.”
“I just wanted to remind you; don’t forget to pay back what you owe tomorrow.”
Xue Erbai: “???”
Did she look like the kind of person who would default on a debt? Even before sleeping, Ji Wushan had to remember this!
That was way too much!!!
Xue Erbai still wanted to say something more, but Ji Wushan had already turned over, pulling the blanket up to her cheeks.
Conversation refused.
Xue Erbai could only raise her hand and then put it back down.
She gritted her teeth in secret: “There is absolutely no way I’m letting Ji Wushan look down on me!”
---
For the remaining two days of the first round of filming, Xue Erbai threw herself entirely into the “paying debts” business.
She left early and came back late, looking utterly worn out.
Pure physical labor like this was very different from sitting in an office handling work.
Even lunch and dinner became much easier for her to deal with; only occasionally did she go brush up her presence beside Ji Wushan.
At noon on the day filming ended, Zhong Dai’s invitation arrived as scheduled.
“Xiao Bai, may I invite you to lunch?”
“Now…?”
Xue Erbai looked at the operating camera, then at Lv Wan standing behind with her arms crossed.
Oh, got it.
Zhong Dai had brought her special impromptu scene-changing script.
“Where are we going to eat?”
“The restaurant where we had our first meal together.”
The restaurant wasn’t far away. Xue Erbai and Zhong Dai walked shoulder to shoulder.
All around them, people turned to look.
At first Xue Erbai didn’t take it seriously; it was just helping a good friend complete a task. But when they were almost at the restaurant, she saw Ji Wushan out and about.
Only an FPD followed behind her. Wearing a sunhat and a long dress, she was returning from the beach.
When she saw Xue Erbai and Zhong Dai, she froze for a moment, then politely asked, “You’re going out?”
Xue Erbai didn’t speak first; Zhong Dai smiled and answered, “Going to have lunch.”
Ji Wushan gave a slight nod. Her gaze stayed on Xue Erbai for a second before she walked away.
Xue Erbai followed her with her eyes; when the figure grew farther and farther away, Zhong Dai finally patted her shoulder and whispered, “Come back to earth!”
Xue Erbai turned and glared at her, then silently followed along.
Zhong Dai had paid a full hundred Encounter Coins; there was no reason for her to stand her up!
Luckily, the two of them had a common topic…
Swimming.
In front of the camera, they talked about it for nearly an hour before getting back in the car and returning to the villa.
The guests’ Encounter Coins were counted.
Because of her invitation, Zhong Dai currently had 0.
Fu Lingnan had taken leave and hadn’t returned, so she also had 0.
Chang Zichen had 70, Deng Lu had 65, Yi Fan had 43,
and Ji Wushan had 81.
Xue Erbai… had 97.
This didn’t even include the 50 she had used to pay off her debt.
Over these days, Xue Erbai had earned the most.
The totals would be accumulated when recording resumed next week.
“Alright, thank you for your hard work, everyone; see you next week!”
“Don’t forget this week’s premiere on Saturday!”
After the cameras were switched off, Lv Wan gave a few simple words. The crowd all started carrying their luggage downstairs.
Xue Erbai was the slowest to leave, because she had come back too late last night after making money and had forgotten to bring some things.
Ji Wushan was the first person to leave the villa. Even when they took the boat, the two of them were far apart, with no chance to speak.
It wasn’t until they got on the plane that Xue Erbai sat down beside Ji Wushan.
The ticket had been booked two days earlier by Qiao You at her request, and it was in a completely different direction from everyone else’s. With the production team out of the way, Xue Erbai was sitting very close to her.
Ji Wushan closed her eyes and pretended to rest, making no move.
Not long after, she discovered that Xue Erbai simply could not sit still!
She couldn’t help opening her eyes to look over.
Xue Erbai’s chestnut curls clung to her cheeks; in the sunlight, she looked especially soft and warm, the corners of her mouth curved in a smile.
Seemingly noticing her gaze, Xue Erbai blinked lightly at her.
Neither of them had time to speak.
Then turbulence struck without warning; the plane lurched downward and quickly rose again, and Ji Wushan’s heart tightened.
A wrist was grabbed, the distance close enough to touch.
She saw Xue Erbai’s light brown pupils up close; warm, clear, clean.
It wasn’t the first time she’d seen them clearly, but every time it felt different.
As if there was no distance at all between the two of them.
But when she thought of the lunch Xue Erbai had shared with Zhong Dai today, Ji Wushan still turned her head away.
A few seconds later, her elbow was nudged, and she heard the rustle of clothing. Looking down, she saw Xue Erbai’s phone had fallen to the floor.
This was…
This was the novel she had seen last time.
Xue Erbai obviously hadn’t expected that either, and when she met Ji Wushan’s eyes, she looked a little flustered.
Lifting a hand, she explained, “J-just…”
“Are you very curious about the host’s line of work?”
Ji Wushan heard herself ask that, and then turned her head away again.
“I am curious.”
“If you’re filming today, can I come in and take a look?”
Xue Erbai simply blurted out what she really wanted to say. She had been to the television station before and had watched from afar, but that was not the same as going in with her.
But after a few seconds, seeing that Ji Wushan still didn’t turn back or agree, she felt a little disappointed.
“Forget it, just pretend…”
“Yes.”
“But you have to be quiet.”
Before she could finish, Ji Wushan answered first.
After answering, she closed her eyes again.
Xue Erbai stared at her for a while, then smiled softly and also closed her eyes to doze lightly.
The car stopped in front of XTV. Xue Erbai and Ji Wushan got out one after the other.
Xue Erbai could barely suppress her excitement; after taking a few steps forward, she realized Ji Wushan hadn’t followed.
She walked back and tried to take Ji Wushan’s hand, but Ji Wushan dodged it.
“?”
Xue Erbai looked at her with confusion, but Ji Wushan gave no explanation. She stood still, looked over Xue Erbai’s shoulder, and then lowered her head.
Xue Erbai became even more puzzled, but when she saw that Ji Wushan’s face had turned faintly pale, she felt something was wrong.
“Why aren’t you answering the phone, Wushan?”
The voice from behind sounded somewhat similar to Ji Wushan’s. Xue Erbai jerked around, only to see a face that was extremely similar to Ji Wushan’s.
She froze for a second before reacting.
It was Ji Wushan’s mother, Song Quwen.
She stood very straight, her figure elegant.
She had studied dance when she was young; after marrying into the Ji family, she had hardly ever done anything, her skin fair and her white dress making her look very young.
She was smiling at the two of them.
Xue Erbai reached a hand back to take Ji Wushan’s hand. Her hand was cold, and her voice trembled slightly as she called, “Mom…”
But Song Quwen seemed unable to feel anything at all; she walked closer and closer, and on closer inspection, that smile held a touch of coldness.
“You still won’t reply to my messages, Ji Wushan.”
“Do you have to wait until your mother comes to see you before you’re happy?”
“No good child stops contacting their family after getting married.”
When Song Quwen called Ji Wushan, she always called her by her full name like this.
It was very distant, yet she still referred to herself affectionately as “Mom.”
But to Ji Wushan, it was only jarring.
She subconsciously leaned toward Xue Erbai…
But she was still trembling uncontrollably.
A few years of lost memory weren’t enough to erase everything.
And because something was missing, she also had no idea how to face it.
That pair of eyes staring her down seemed to see through everything.
Her unwanted existence.
Wushan, do not be born.
---
Author’s Note: I’ll update tomorrow at 5 p.m.!
Ahhh, another day completed!!!