Chapter 76

Over these past three days, Gu Yanqiu had imagined countless versions of her confession scene. She’d thought about preparing this and that, about choosing just the right atmosphere to lay bare her feelings. But when that moment really came, all that remained in her mind was one thought; no, perhaps it was more accurate to call it a pure instinctive impulse.

The instant she saw Lin Yuewei sleeping so obediently and peacefully on the sofa, that impulse flared up inside her. It was the precious thing she had thought of for so long, longed for for so long...

Her heart was pounding so hard it felt like it might give out at any second. She couldn’t wait another moment and kissed her in a rush; because she was too forceful, her lips even bumped against Lin Yuewei’s slightly parted teeth.

The jolt woke Lin Yuewei right out of her dream. She suddenly opened her eyes wide.

Lin Yuewei: “!!”

The real Gu Yanqiu! Not a dream!

Lin Yuewei braced one hand on the sofa arm and half sat up, only to be pinned by Gu Yanqiu and pressed back against the sofa. Lin Yuewei was stunned for just a second before she caught Gu Yanqiu by the back of the neck with one hand and kissed her back fiercely.

It was their first kiss while both of them were fully awake; neither of them had the slightest technique, and they ended up kissing each other into a daze, nearly suffocating to death.

Lin Yuewei’s face flushed red. She pushed Gu Yanqiu hard in the chest to get a breath in and said, “No, I’m going to suffocate.”

Gu Yanqiu watched her draw in a fresh gulp of air, then lunged at her again.

Lin Yuewei: “Mmph.”

That one breath of fresh air didn’t last long before Lin Yuewei pushed her away again. “Let me say something.”

Gu Yanqiu’s hand, which had been cradling her head, shifted to hold her hand instead. Her chest rose and fell hard twice before she finally said, “Go on.”

Lin Yuewei looked at her in surprise; a thought surfaced in her mind. “You didn’t even breathe just now, did you?”

Gu Yanqiu gave a quiet “mm.” She looked calm on the surface, but there was a trace of smugness hidden inside as she said, “I specifically practiced holding my breath.”

Lin Yuewei asked casually, “Why were you practicing that?”

Gu Yanqiu looked at her intently and said, “Probably for today.”

“...” Lin Yuewei was a little overwhelmed. Gu Yanqiu now seemed like some little beast inside her that had been unlatched and set free; every so often she would bump lightly into Lin Yuewei, making her itch all over.

Gu Yanqiu’s face was faintly red. Lin Yuewei didn’t know if it was from lack of oxygen or from saying something a little too bold for her; her lips moved, and she swallowed back the words she had been about to blurt out.

The two of them stared at each other wide-eyed for a while.

Lin Yuewei cleared her throat. “I have something to tell you.”

“You like me; I know,” Gu Yanqiu answered first.

Lin Yuewei said angrily, “You—” Since when were you allowed to抢答 like that?

This might be the one and only confession of her life, and it had been snatched away just like that???

Before her anger could fully rise, Gu Yanqiu bit her lip and added, “I like you too; did you know that?”

Lin Yuewei: “...”

If not for the fact that Gu Yanqiu was already unconsciously tightening her grip on Lin Yuewei’s hand, Lin Yuewei would have thought she was completely unmoved inside.

Lin Yuewei remained just as calm as she replied, “Mm, I know.”

That was it.

Gu Yanqiu frowned. She didn’t even know why she was frowning, only that something seemed off.

Lin Yuewei was both annoyed and amused. She reached out and flicked Gu Yanqiu’s chin. “You’re dumbfounded, aren’t you? A perfectly good confession, and you messed it up so much there’s not a shred of ceremony left.”

Gu Yanqiu wore a pained expression. After a long moment, she said a little ruefully, “How about we do it again?”

After finally getting through such an agonizing three days, it had ended in just a few short sentences. There was no candlelit dinner, no lyrical tune, no involuntary embrace and kiss; what they had just done didn’t even count as an embrace and kiss. At most, it was gnawing.

Lin Yuewei raised a brow and leaned back. “Okay; you go first.”

Gu Yanqiu fell into deep thought. After a long while, she knelt on one knee in front of Lin Yuewei.

Lin Yuewei crossed one leg over the other and said, “This is a proposal. We’re already married, so that’s not right.”

Gu Yanqiu said, “Then I’ll go prepare some red wine. And a record player.”

Lin Yuewei said, “Aren’t you also supposed to cook something? Just drinking wine would be too dull.”

“Ah.” Gu Yanqiu answered, then sat down again. “If I cook, it’ll take too long. Forget it.” She also sat down on the sofa, throwing caution to the wind.

Then she heard Lin Yuewei laugh. She turned her head and looked over; Lin Yuewei really was laughing.

The laughing Lin Yuewei opened her arms and patted her own thigh with one hand, the meaning obvious.

Gu Yanqiu’s ears were burning. She asked the question she already knew the answer to anyway: “What are you doing?”

Lin Yuewei curled her lips. “Sit here.”

Gu Yanqiu immediately looked troubled.

Lin Yuewei pretended to sigh. “You said you like me, and this tiny little request, you still can’t satisfy me?”

Gu Yanqiu inched toward Lin Yuewei step by step. When she stood in front of her, she asked first, “Can I sit?”

Lin Yuewei was laughing her head off inside, but on the outside she said coolly, “Sit.”

The moment she sat down, Lin Yuewei felt the position was wrong. She reached down with one hand; good grief, Gu Yanqiu was at least a hand’s width away from her thighs. She pressed both hands on Gu Yanqiu’s shoulders and pushed down hard.

Gu Yanqiu’s center of gravity wobbled. Her hand reflexively flew over Lin Yuewei’s shoulder to grab the back of the sofa, but Lin Yuewei, displeased, yanked her hand down and looped it around her own neck.

Gu Yanqiu’s whole body was practically spelling awkwardness. Lin Yuewei held her tight and barked softly, “Don’t move.”

Gu Yanqiu didn’t dare move. She whispered in protest, “I’m not used to it.”

Lin Yuewei, on the other hand, was very practiced at holding her. Soft and fragrant; she enjoyed it so much that her eyes narrowed with a smile. “You’ll get used to it soon.”

Gu Yanqiu narrowed her eyes too. “Why can’t I be the one holding you?”

Lin Yuewei tilted her head and kissed the tip of her nose. “Because you’re softer. You look like you were made to be held.”

But Gu Yanqiu said, “How would you know if you don’t try?”

“Then let’s try it,” Lin Yuewei said.

They switched. Lin Yuewei ended up sitting on Gu Yanqiu’s lap, while Gu Yanqiu sat on the sofa with her arms wrapped around her and asked, “How is it?”

Lin Yuewei: “...”

It was pretty comfortable.

But Lin Yuewei was not about to admit defeat. She braced one foot on the floor as if to get down and said, “Still better if I hold you.”

“I’ll hold you.” Gu Yanqiu tightened her arms around her waist and refused to let go.

“You, seriously—what difference does it make whether you hold me or I hold you?” Lin Yuewei struggled twice but couldn’t break free, and couldn’t help but snap.

“No difference; so I’ll hold you.”

“You said you liked me; you can’t even satisfy this little request?” Lin Yuewei hauled out that same line again.

“You also said you like me. I already satisfied one of your requests just now; isn’t it your turn to satisfy one of mine?” Gu Yanqiu replied with impeccable logic, leaving no room to argue.

Lin Yuewei couldn’t outtalk her, and she also wasn’t stronger than her. After staring at her for a while, she thought in bewilderment: this isn’t quite what she had imagined. Gu Yanqiu should have been the cute little thing she could knead in her arms, shy and sweet; how had she ended up the one trapped in Gu Yanqiu’s embrace and unable to move? Who exactly was the cute little thing here?

In the end, they compromised. Lin Yuewei proposed, “Why don’t we time it? You hold me for as long as I hold you. Starting from just now, you’ve held me for two minutes, so now it’s my turn; two minutes.”

“The agreement starts from this second, so it should be counted from this second,” Gu Yanqiu said. “When contracts are signed, they don’t count the time that’s already passed; at most, they take effect immediately.”

Lin Yuewei: “...”

“Ten minutes per round then; two minutes is too short.” Gu Yanqiu looked at her watch and made the decision.

Purely in terms of physical comfort, sitting on someone’s lap was nowhere near as comfortable as sitting on a sofa or a stool. The weight distribution was uneven, and the pressure could make the muscles ache and then go numb. Neither of them felt comfortable; they needed to get up and move around a little. When Lin Yuewei was a bit younger, she never liked it when her parents held her and sat her on their laps. If the person under her wasn’t Gu Yanqiu, she wouldn’t have been able to stay there even for a second.

Using Gu Yanqiu’s shoulder for support, Lin Yuewei adjusted herself for quite a while before finding a relatively comfortable position. She let out a long breath. Sitting like this, she was a head taller than Gu Yanqiu, and looking down at her from above, she said, “There.”

There was a bit of deliberate intent in that.

She hoped Gu Yanqiu would retreat in the face of difficulty and obediently let herself be held; how nice would that be? There was no need to fight her for it.

But Gu Yanqiu insisted on fighting her all the way. She leaned back a little, stretching the distance between them so their eye level didn’t seem quite so uneven.

Lin Yuewei deliberately picked a fault. “You’re making me sit too unsteadily like this.”

Gu Yanqiu leaned forward a little, and before Lin Yuewei could find another flaw in the arrangement, Gu Yanqiu held her face with one hand and moved close; their lips met, and her breath brushed across Lin Yuewei’s cheeks.

Strictly speaking, neither of them had ever really kissed before.

How about they just kiss properly?

Lin Yuewei’s throat bobbed. Recalling what she had seen on TV before, she cautiously took Gu Yanqiu’s lip between hers and gently tugged at it with her teeth.

Gu Yanqiu honestly reacted, “It hurts a little.”

Lin Yuewei felt a bit embarrassed. “Really?”

Gu Yanqiu immediately changed her answer. “Not really.”

Lin Yuewei didn’t believe her this time and tried again. She didn’t bite this time; instead she pressed against her for a while before softly slipping out a little tip of her tongue.

She stole a glance at Gu Yanqiu’s reaction. Gu Yanqiu had no reaction. Mm; no reaction was the best reaction. Keep at it.

Lin Yuewei had secretly kissed Gu Yanqiu several times while she was asleep; one of those times had been fairly complete, so she still had some confidence in herself. Isn’t it just kissing? What couldn’t she do? But back then Gu Yanqiu had been asleep; now Gu Yanqiu was awake. She would respond to her.

And she did respond; very enthusiastically, and also... in complete disarray. Their tacit understanding was touching.

One person went here, the other went there; in that tiny little space, they still somehow couldn’t find each other. And when they did find each other, it was like a battle, with all that back-and-forth nonsense completely absent.

When they parted, Lin Yuewei sighed, and Gu Yanqiu frowned.

What lip-and-tongue entanglement, what reluctance to part, what inability to let go; novels were all lies.

Lin Yuewei was thirsty and asked, “Do you want some water?”

Gu Yanqiu nodded.

Lin Yuewei patted her arm. “Let me down.”

Gu Yanqiu let go.

Lin Yuewei hopped down, went to the kitchen to pour two glasses of water, and when Gu Yanqiu reached out to take the cup, Lin Yuewei took a big gulp first and made two “mm-mm” sounds with different tones.

“...” Gu Yanqiu understood; those two syllables meant “open your mouth.”

Gu Yanqiu opened her mouth. Lin Yuewei bent down and fed her a sip of water; only a tiny sip. Gu Yanqiu picked up the water on the coffee table and tilted her head back to drink half the glass in one go. She was even thirstier than Lin Yuewei.

Lin Yuewei set down her glass and sat on the sofa, smiling at her without saying anything.

At first Gu Yanqiu didn’t understand why, until a few minutes later Lin Yuewei suddenly went, “Ah,” and said, “Has it been ten minutes? It’s almost been fifteen, right?”

Gu Yanqiu: “...” So that was what she’d been waiting for.

Before Gu Yanqiu could speak, Lin Yuewei said, “The contract didn’t say the timer stops when you get down. Immediate effect means ten minutes starting from just now; it’s your turn.”

Gu Yanqiu: “...”

Lin Yuewei got what she wanted. Although it was only ten minutes, she made full use of them; she would pinch Gu Yanqiu’s hand from time to time, touch her face, or hold her tightly, wasting not a single second.

When she finally let Gu Yanqiu down, Lin Yuewei still asked reluctantly, “Why do you dislike sitting on my lap so much?”

“Then why do you?”

“I like holding you.”

“So do I.”

For the time being, this issue wasn’t going to be resolved.

Gu Yanqiu glanced at her watch. Only then did she realize they’d been glued to the sofa for an entire hour, even though they hadn’t really done anything at all. A familiar hunger rose in her stomach, and Gu Yanqiu asked naturally, “What am I having for dinner tonight?”

“Candlelit dinner?” Lin Yuewei said. “I want to eat too; let’s celebrate.”

“Okay; let’s celebrate both things together.” Gu Yanqiu took out her phone. “I’ll call to reserve a table.”

Both things? Lin Yuewei was stunned for a moment before she remembered: one thing was celebrating that she had signed a new contract three days ago, and the other was naturally today, when they were officially together. The second one sounded a little strange; they’d already been married for half a year, and now they were celebrating starting to date.

Gu Yanqiu looked down at Lin Yuewei’s bare feet and said, “Do you want to take a shower and change clothes before we go out?” She looked dusty from traveling.

Lin Yuewei looked herself over and said, “Sure.”

Gu Yanqiu said, “Then I’ll wait downstairs.”

“Okay.” Lin Yuewei went upstairs. As she turned the corner, she heard Gu Yanqiu downstairs speaking on the phone to reserve a table at the restaurant, her tone that of a refined young lady from a well-bred family; gentle, courteous, and modest.

Lin Yuewei stood where she was and listened until Gu Yanqiu finished the call before entering the room. She closed the door and leaned against it for a while. Was she really together with Gu Yanqiu? Were they really together?

She pinched her own arm. It hurt; this wasn’t a dream.

But just because this wasn’t a dream now didn’t mean the scene downstairs a moment ago wasn’t one. Had Gu Yanqiu really come home?

Lin Yuewei opened the door again and hurried downstairs, but halfway down she stopped abruptly. Gu Yanqiu appeared in the middle of the stairs, looking up at her in surprise.

Gu Yanqiu paused. “I came upstairs to look for something.”

Lin Yuewei stared at her without blinking. “I also came downstairs to look for something.”

They both nodded at each other, and in the instant they passed one another, they turned to look back at the same time. The next second, they leaned in and their lips met with a crisp smack that startled both of them.

Lin Yuewei curved her lips. “I came downstairs to look for my girlfriend.”

“So did I.” Gu Yanqiu’s lips curved too.

“I’m going to take a shower now.” Lin Yuewei’s brows and eyes were bright with delight.

“I will too.”

Lin Yuewei blinked, immediately taking it the wrong way. She thought: Wow, a mixed bath? Do we have to be this bold? Gu Cute, this little cutie, is way too open. They’d only just gotten together; wasn’t that a bit inappropriate? But they were already married, so washing together didn’t seem like that big a deal.

Lin Yuewei fell into a dilemma, unsure whether she should refuse.

Gu Yanqiu said, “You wash inside; I’ll wait outside. If you need me, just call.”

Half of Lin Yuewei’s ear immediately burned. “...Oh. Okay.”

So that was what “I’ll go too” meant.

The two of them walked one after the other to the master bedroom. The room they had lived in together for quite a while should have felt familiar, but when Lin Yuewei opened the door and went in, she somehow felt shy while inviting Gu Yanqiu in. “Come in.”

Gu Yanqiu looked as if this were her first time entering too, flashing her a short smile while her eyes darted everywhere and her feet didn’t know where to step.

“You can sit on the sofa,” Lin Yuewei said, influenced by her and feeling a little nervous herself.

“Okay.”

“I’m going to shower.”

“Okay.”

Lin Yuewei’s throat felt itchy. She coughed once and said nothing more. This time, she remembered to bring her change of clothes into the bathroom in advance.

Gu Yanqiu sat properly on the sofa outside, eyes fixed straight ahead at the blank white wall, not moving at all. The moment Lin Yuewei came out, she immediately stood. “Done?”

Lin Yuewei was drying her hair with a large towel. “I still need to blow-dry it before we can go.”

Gu Yanqiu hesitated for about a second, then strode over and took the towel from her. “I’ll blow it for you. The hair dryer’s in the drawer, right?”

“...Yes.”

Lin Yuewei rested both hands on her knees. Even when the warm air of the hair dryer hit her head, she still felt an intense sense of unreality. She looked up at Gu Yanqiu, who was pursing her lips as she blow-dried her hair, and studied her features carefully. For some reason, she suddenly lowered her head again and looked at the shadow the light cast of Gu Yanqiu on the floor.

Gu Yanqiu noticed her gaze and gave her a gentle smile.

Seeing that, Lin Yuewei felt a little guilty.

Gu Yanqiu’s nimble fingers moved through her hair. After finishing, she smoothed it out for her, picked up the strands that had fallen on the bed and floor, and threw them into the trash. Then she cupped Lin Yuewei’s face in both hands and gave her lips a light kiss, smiling with curved eyes. “All done.”

Warmth filled Lin Yuewei’s heart. She couldn’t help leaning in to kiss her again and confessed, “I like you. I really like you. I’ve been working outside these past few days and missing you so much I nearly died.”

Gu Yanqiu shot her a glare.

Lin Yuewei immediately turned her head away and said, “Pah pah.”

After the “pah pah,” she wrapped both arms around Gu Yanqiu’s waist and let out a satisfied sigh. “Honestly, I’d already guessed you liked me, but I was worried I might be reading too much into it; you know, one of the three great illusions of life, ‘she likes me.’ So I wanted to wait a bit longer, until I was more certain.”

“So did I.”

“Then why didn’t you say it sooner? You should be smarter than me.”

“Not at all; I’m not smarter than you. You already knew from the beginning that I would fall for you, and when we made our three rules, you specifically emphasized that I mustn’t like you.”

“You’re so petty. That was ancient history.”

“Who was it that kept bringing up those few lines I said about not being interested in you? You were still repeating them a few days ago when you had a cold.”

“Gu Yanqiu.” Lin Yuewei let go of her and looked up at her with a trace of anger.

“Lin Yuewei.” Gu Yanqiu answered in kind, knowing perfectly well she wasn’t actually angry.

They glared at each other for only a few seconds before Lin Yuewei cracked up. “Can we not keep dragging up old scores?”

“You don’t bring them up, and I won’t either.”

“If I bring them up, you’re not allowed to either.” Lin Yuewei was the sort of person who could not bear to lose out. Not only could she not bear to lose out, she also had to take advantage wherever possible; in plain terms, she was spoiled by being pampered and had a talent for pushing her luck. She had been raised that way since childhood.

“Why?” Unfortunately, the person she had met was Gu Yanqiu. Gu Yanqiu did not yield even a little and sincerely asked the question.

Lin Yuewei once again felt that sharp difference from the couples in novels and TV dramas, and suspiciously wondered: had she ended up with a fake girlfriend?

She licked her lips, organized her thoughts, and asked, “Can’t you just let me have this one?”

“Of course.”

“Huh?” Lin Yuewei was surprised. She actually agreed that easily?

“As long as you obediently let me hold you in the future and don’t fuss over everything.” Gu Yanqiu stated the condition for the exchange.

“No.” Lin Yuewei rejected it flatly. “Not a chance.”

“Why?” Gu Yanqiu asked again.

“No reason.”

“Mm.” Gu Yanqiu said, a bit puzzled.

Lin Yuewei had an idea and said, “Then I can let you have your way instead. Same condition as yours; you have to let me hold you like that.”

Gu Yanqiu also refused firmly. “No.”

“I’m letting you have your way.”

“I don’t have anything that needs me to be yielded to. We’re equals; when something comes up, we just discuss it. Why must one person always yield to the other?” Gu Yanqiu asked strangely.

“...” Lin Yuewei was at a loss for words and stubbornly said, “That’s how it’s always done on TV, and in novels too.”

“That’s TV and novels; it’s not you and me.”

“You—” Lin Yuewei was speechless. She stood up, only to realize she was shorter than Gu Yanqiu and became annoyed, so she rose onto her toes and said, “Are you going to let me or not?”

“Be specific; what exactly is it?”

“I can bring up old scores; you can’t.”

“No.”

“Why?!” Lin Yuewei held back the urge to shout.

“In a relationship, whether it’s between lovers or friends, the most important thing is equality. Only equality can last. If one person keeps yielding, the one doing the yielding will feel it’s unfair and develop resentment; while the other will either become insatiable or grow tired of the one-sided concession. Either outcome leads to separation.” Gu Yanqiu frowned slightly, her expression serious as she explained.

Lin Yuewei felt utterly spent. She pinched the bridge of her nose and peeked at her through her fingers, saying with deep anguish, “Gu Yanqiu, are you actually a straight man?”

Gu Yanqiu shook her head. “No; I’m a lesbian.”

Lin Yuewei said, “Then do you even know what marital romance is?” At last she couldn’t hold back and raised her voice. “What’s wrong with letting me win this one? Would letting me be happy cost you a pound of flesh or something? It’s not like I really meant to keep dragging up old scores. Then I’ll let you have your way, okay? You can bring up old scores, and I won’t. Fine?”

Gu Yanqiu thought about it, then still said, “No.”

Lin Yuewei: “...”

After a while of silence, she got up to leave. If she stayed here any longer, she felt she really might be angered to death by Gu Yanqiu.

Gu Yanqiu grabbed her.

Lin Yuewei turned back and looked at her with utter calm. If Gu Yanqiu said one more straight-man thing, she was going to slam her head into... the bed.

Gu Yanqiu’s brows were furrowed into a little mound, her cheeks puffed out too, and she said angrily, “I mean I don’t want us to be separated one day; don’t you understand that?”

In one second, Lin Yuewei forgot why she had been angry. Her heart alarms were going off like crazy. Good heavens, how could there be anyone as beautiful and adorable as Gu Yanqiu in this world?

Lin Yuewei nodded furiously. “I understand, I understand. Equality makes for longevity.”

Gu Yanqiu held her hand, held it tight, and said, “I hope we can last a very, very long time; I want to be with you for the rest of our lives.”

Lin Yuewei was dazzled into stupidity by her beauty. “Okay, okay; yes, yes.”

Gu Yanqiu said in dissatisfaction, “Are you even listening to me?” Wasn’t that a confession? Who exactly was the straight man here?!

Lin Yuewei, the straight man, stepped forward and sealed those perfectly shaped red lips of hers. What more was there to say? Gu Yanqiu was absolutely right! She would listen to everything Gu Yanqiu said!

Author’s Note: “The Love of Two Straight Men” ︵_︵

I specifically asked my girlfriend whether she likes it when I hold her on my lap or when she holds me. My girlfriend answered without the slightest hesitation: I’d still rather hold you ︵_︵

Today is also another day when you still can’t tell who the top is 2333

Lin top, charge!

TL Note:

2333 = LMAO