Chapter 60

“I can’t change that.”

Sheng Huaixi lowered her lashes, staring at the distance Jiang Chao had drawn back to. One hand braced against the sofa as she leaned forward, erasing the space Jiang Chao had put between them in a single motion.

The distance between them slowly disappeared. Sheng Huaixi tipped forward, set a hand on Jiang Chao’s thigh, and left it there.

Jiang Chao pressed her lips together and didn’t move, letting Sheng Huaixi’s palm rest on her thigh.

Their gazes met—one steady and clear, the other stubborn and deep. Neither gave in.

Little by little, a faint smile gathered in Sheng Huaixi’s eyes. It was like spider silk, each thread distinct as it wove a net that framed Jiang Chao inside it.

“You want me to stop hurting myself, don’t you, Jiang Chao?”

That leisurely smile slowly unfurled before Jiang Chao. Sheng Huaixi’s face reflected in her pupils; the question she asked was soft and gentle, like a breath brushing the heart.

“Mm...”

Jiang Chao bit down on the tip of her tongue. The sharp, prickling pain jolted her out of Sheng Huaixi’s deep gaze. When she spoke again, the words practically spilled out, nearly tangling on themselves.

The thin, affirmative sound reached Sheng Huaixi’s ears; it was the answer she had expected.

Jiang Chao’s thoughts were almost written all over her face. Sheng Huaixi didn’t need to guess much to know the answer; the only question was whether it had ever been laid out plainly.

And now Sheng Huaixi turned it over, set it on the table, and pushed it in front of Jiang Chao like a chess piece.

Her fingers shifted slightly, tapping the inside of Jiang Chao’s thigh, the pad of her finger brushing lightly over the skin with a faint smile.

It was ticklish.

Jiang Chao’s thigh instinctively tightened, trying to escape the sensation. Her brows drew together faintly as she lifted her eyes to Sheng Huaixi. “Don’t move...”

As she wished, Sheng Huaixi stopped. Her gaze on Jiang Chao deepened, dark currents surging up to press down with overwhelming force as her voice dropped.

“But I won’t do that, Jiang Chao.”

“Absolutely not.”

Sheng Huaixi’s low voice rang out between them, and with every word, all the obsession she usually kept suppressed was laid bare in the look they shared.

Her stare was like an arrow; the cold, gleaming tip drove straight into Jiang Chao’s body without restraint. The shaft pinned her in place before slowly lifting her into the air.

Being held under Sheng Huaixi’s gaze made Jiang Chao feel chilled to the bone.

The words came out crisp and decisive. Sheng Huaixi showed no intention of leaving room for negotiation; more than that, Jiang Chao could feel the heavy pressure of her gaze settling on her all at once.

It was only then that Jiang Chao rarely sensed the terrifying presence Sheng Huaixi carried—cold and ruthless, unmoved by anything, pressing down until she could barely breathe.

The hand on the outside of her thigh suddenly tightened. Jiang Chao pinched her palm, silently forcing herself to calm down again. The pain spread quickly through her senses, and that spreading ache kept her emotions in check.

She met Sheng Huaixi’s gaze head-on, her eyes sharp with pain, refusing to back down as she held to her own view.

“Sheng Huaixi, I can’t accept you hurting yourself because of me. Do you understand?”

A light hum slipped from Sheng Huaixi’s throat. Jiang Chao couldn’t tell whether it was praise or displeasure, but she didn’t waver, keeping her gaze fixed on Sheng Huaixi’s eyes.

“An elusive sense of responsibility? Your own conscience? Or because you feel sorry for me?”

By the end, Sheng Huaixi suddenly softened her voice, leaning closer to Jiang Chao with a trace of expectation.

Her dark pupils were bright and clear, filled with a kind of expectation no one could easily refuse, as if the clouds of the whole starry sky had fallen into her eyes.

“All of them.”

Jiang Chao quickly licked her lips. Under Sheng Huaixi’s anticipation, she fell silent for a moment; in the end, she still answered honestly, her gaze clear and bright as she looked steadily at Sheng Huaixi in front of her.

When Sheng Huaixi had just made those guesses, the corners of her mouth held a faint smile that was almost a sneer; soft, but with a slight narrowing of the eyes there was a trace of viciousness, and the aggression rolling off her was all too strong.

Just looking at her like that made Jiang Chao’s heart skip a beat, then start racing out of control.

The sounds around her were swallowed by the pounding of her heartbeat. Jiang Chao clenched her fingers into her palm and, under Sheng Huaixi’s stare, looked away.

“If you keep doing this, I’ll be scared.”

Sheng Huaixi’s expression darkened. Jiang Chao tilted her face aside and kept going on her own.

“You doing all this because of me... yes, these few times I managed to keep up with what you were thinking, but what if I miss it once? Or what if I’m like last time, when you were drugged and I only found out the next morning?”

She forced the words out in one breath, and the heat in Sheng Huaixi’s gaze slowly returned. Jiang Chao paused to catch her breath, then steeled herself and finished what was in her chest.

“The first time, the second time, every time... I’d still be unable to stop myself from worrying, from being afraid, from agonizing over whether I could bear the consequences of your thoughts.”

“I’m not afraid of you doing those things. I’m afraid I won’t be able to bear the wildness in you that comes because of me. Sometimes, I even think, what if something goes wrong...”

Her voice rose little by little, yet the words she forced out trembled more and more violently. By the final sentence, what Jiang Chao managed to say was already breaking apart.

It was like a blurred mosaic of tiny squares, faintly obscuring the exact meaning behind the words.

Jiang Chao blinked her long lashes and spoke all of it almost without taking a breath. When she looked up again, her face was flushed red from the emotional upheaval.

She met Sheng Huaixi’s gaze, and found it full of deep, unhidden amusement.

Sheng Huaixi was smiling? And very happily?

Jiang Chao froze. Sheng Huaixi’s reaction once again shattered her assumptions, and confusion rose between her brows.

After hearing what she had just said, Sheng Huaixi was actually smiling so happily?

The smile on Sheng Huaixi’s face was no longer the fake, half-smiling expression from before. It was real, excited happiness, the emotions flickering in her eyes growing darker and more intense.

It was genuine delight, the kind stirred by Jiang Chao’s words.

Jiang Chao looked baffled. “You... you’re happy?”

Sheng Huaixi nodded without the slightest hesitation. “Yes.”

A question and an answer; this time, the reply Jiang Chao got was gentler than before by who knew how much, and the smile on Sheng Huaixi’s face was brighter as well.

“Jiang Chao.”

Sheng Huaixi pressed her lips together, the tip of her tongue tracing eagerly over her teeth. The numb ache had turned into a stimulant, and her blood was heating with excitement over what Jiang Chao had just said.

Leaning forward, Sheng Huaixi curved her lips and moved toward Jiang Chao’s suddenly constricted gaze. The hand braced on Jiang Chao’s thigh slid downward with the motion.

In almost a single instant, her palm rubbed along the inside of Jiang Chao’s thigh.

“Mn—”

With a muffled groan, Jiang Chao’s lower back hit the sofa. Sheng Huaixi’s breath surrounded her from the front, and the thigh pinned beneath that hand felt dangerously exposed.

She was already completely wrapped in Sheng Huaixi’s presence.

“You’re so cute..."

What she was talking about were her own thoughts, but what Sheng Huaixi heard in them was nothing but Jiang Chao’s concern for her.

Concern that Sheng Huaixi would get into trouble. Concern that Sheng Huaixi would play with fire and burn herself. Concern that, in the end, the things Sheng Huaixi did would be beyond Jiang Chao’s ability to handle...

“Jiang Chao, say a little more to me, okay?”

“I’ll like it. Say a little more for me; let me hear it again, okay...”

Sheng Huaixi pressed over Jiang Chao, and in her eyes bloomed a delighted excitement like flowers bursting open. Every drop of blood in her body was boiling.

So happy. Jiang Chao caring about her like this... there was so much to like.