Kneading

The position wasn’t very comfortable, and Xu Zhitong only managed to doze for half an hour before waking up.

Lin Yang had already turned over. Her lotus-white wrist rested on the edge of the sofa, while the other hand was still obediently letting Xu Zhitong hold it.

Xu Zhitong took out her phone and snapped a photo of their overlapping hands.

The light was dim, so the picture didn’t turn out very well; even the tiny diamonds didn’t sparkle much.

Interlaced hands on a beige sofa.

Xu Zhitong studied it for a moment, then decided she liked it.

Her legs had gone a little numb, so Xu Zhitong shifted around and casually checked the temperature of the heat patch on Lin Yang’s stomach; it was working pretty well.

Only then did she grimace and change her position, settling into a seated lean at the foot of the sofa.

She replied to some business promotion messages on her phone.

Even though she was only a singing streamer, she also had a RedNote account for posting vlogs and everyday updates, and the promotion offers she got covered all kinds of categories.

She sorted through them, putting the clothing promotions that only required an on-camera appearance in one pile and the ones that needed a separate script and video in another.

Xu Zhitong wasn’t very familiar with any of these brands, so she needed Lin Yang to confirm them a second time.

After sorting through everything, Xu Zhitong couldn’t help calculating the total amount of promotion fees she’d been quoted just this week.

When she finished, she sighed in admiration.

She really did make money now.

After replying to the messages, Xu Zhitong picked up the novel she hadn’t finished reading, tore open a pack of little cookies, and sat on the floor beside Lin Yang’s sofa, hugging her knees as she read.

A little over an hour later, near five o’clock, Lin Yang finally woke up.

The sofa behind her shifted, and Xu Zhitong immediately put down her book and turned to look.

Lin Yang sat up half-buried in the cushions, the right side of her face sleep-flushed and a little red, her eyes dazed.

But she looked much better.

Xu Zhitong handed her the warm water and asked, “How do you feel?”

Lin Yang took it, drank a few mouthfuls, and nodded tiredly. “It doesn’t hurt that much anymore.”

Xu Zhitong was curious. “Is it because of that medicine? It works that well?”

“Mm,” Lin Yang said. “I found it when I was studying abroad. It works really well for my kind of period pain.”

Xu Zhitong let out a breath of relief. “That’s great, then.”

She took back the cup and stood up.

Lin Yang seemed to want to get up too, but just as she braced a hand on the sofa, she stopped.

She had noticed the diamond ring on her middle finger.

Lin Yang: “……”

The look on her face made it obvious she’d only just noticed the ring.

Heh.

Xu Zhitong felt smug inside, practically wanting to wag her tail as she lifted her brows.

“Pretty impressive, right? When I went to your place just now, I just rummaged around a little and found it.”

Lin Yang: …?

She stared blankly at the ring on her finger, then looked up at Xu Zhitong’s hand as if to confirm what she was seeing.

Xu Zhitong voluntarily sat back down and took Lin Yang’s hand.

Her own hand rested halfway over the back of Lin Yang’s, bringing the two matching diamond rings very close together.

Xu Zhitong said rather proudly, “I wasn’t digging around on purpose, okay? I was looking for the medicine box and just happened to glance at the drawer. Maybe it was fate; I happened to find it, so I brought it over.”

Her pinky, with the little diamond ring on it, moved a little restlessly to hook around Lin Yang’s middle finger.

“It’s really pretty,” Xu Zhitong said, then asked, “But it’s a pity, isn’t it? Was it bought years ago? I tried for ages and found that now I can only wear it on my pinky.”

“……”

Lin Yang looked a little dazed.

She didn’t answer. After a while, she asked, “Do you like it?”

Huh?

Did she like it?

This was a pair of couple rings; they were even diamond rings.

Of course she liked them to death.

Xu Zhitong’s eyes lit up, and she nodded vigorously. “I like it.”

Only then did the corner of Lin Yang’s mouth curve. She answered the earlier question and said, “Mm, maybe my hand has changed a little.”

As she spoke, Lin Yang lifted Xu Zhitong’s hand and held it up in front of her, studying it very carefully.

Her pinky—or rather, the ring that fit right at the base of the finger.

Her expression was strangely distant, as if she were remembering something, or missing something.

Xu Zhitong thought, Could this be something from the past I don’t know about again?

Damn it. Why didn’t she have even a tiny bit of memory of how she and Lin Yang had confessed, fallen in love, and grown so close that they’d even bought diamond rings…

Thinking about that, Xu Zhitong felt a little unhappy, so she leaned in closer on purpose and asked, “Has it been a long time? When did you buy it?”

Lin Yang paused.

A moment later, she said, “In my second year of university. That was when I earned my first money.”

Back then, after she checked the amount deposited into her account at the apartment, she saw it was quite a lot; but then she thought that compared to her mother, it was probably far too insignificant, and she felt a little lost.

She went to a Chinese restaurant alone for lunch. The food was terrible, and afterward she walked in a nearby park.

There were many beautiful flowering trees in the park.

Lin Yang sat on a swing; across from her was the largest tree in the park, its branches stretching sideways, flower-laden boughs drooping in clusters.

After swinging for a while, a white couple came over. After taking a bunch of selfies, one of them suddenly dropped to one knee and proposed, head tilted up.

From a distance, Lin Yang watched as the person being proposed to covered their mouth in surprise and cried, the two of them hugging, kissing, and putting on the ring.

It was very romantic.

Lin Yang let go of the swing chain, which carried a cold, rusted smell, and silently took out her phone. She opened the campus forum for Jiangshi University and saw that a missing-person post she’d bookmarked a few days ago had gotten an update.

Last week was Jiangshi University’s club festival. Through Moments, Lin Yang had learned that Xu Zhitong had been dragged to the drama club by her roommate and played a knight.

She drew a lot of attention, but after the performance Xu Zhitong ran off, leaving a lot of people waiting for her contact information and class schedule.

At the moment, only the poster of that missing-person thread had successfully added her contact, but the conversation probably hadn’t gone anywhere. The poster said they were planning to go confess directly that night.

It was already night in the country; the time over there was probably just about right for a confession.

Lin Yang imagined for a while what Xu Zhitong’s reaction might be, and didn’t think Xu Zhitong would agree.

Separated by an ocean, the afternoon sunlight where she was was warm and bright.

Looking at the couple, Lin Yang thought again: if I flew back home right now and stood under the dorm building at Jiangshi University to confess to Xu Zhitong, what would her reaction be? Would she be like that couple, surprised and delighted, and accept the ring?

Lin Yang thought about it for a while, but couldn’t come to a conclusion. Still, her spirits lifted somewhat, and she suddenly felt an impulse; she bought two rings and even booked a plane ticket.

But in the end, those rings were never given away.

Now, looking at the small diamond ring on Xu Zhitong’s pinky, Lin Yang found her younger self pretty funny too.

She hadn’t earned much from her first paycheck, yet she’d still been carried away enough to buy diamonds that small, a ring size that small.

If she’d really given it to her, and it didn’t fit, how awkward would that have been.

Her memories slowly receded.

Lin Yang smiled and lightly stroked Xu Zhitong’s finger, saying, “It is a little small. I’ll buy you a bigger one, okay?”

Bigger, meaning the band size, or the diamond?

Xu Zhitong didn’t care much about that, though; all she could think about was how clearly Lin Yang had just drifted off.

She felt a little strange.

She couldn’t tell if she was jealous.

Of course she was a little jealous; after all, she didn’t have those possibly happy, beautiful memories. The first time she saw this ring, it was tucked away in the corner of the drawer on the dressing table in their separate residences.

But somehow, she also didn’t really want a bigger, better-fitting diamond ring.

No matter how small this ring was, it had belonged to the version of herself before she lost her memory.

She and that self were the same person.

Xu Zhitong mulled it over for a long time, but still couldn’t sort out how she felt.

In the end, she shook her head. “No need. This one’s great.”

Lin Yang only thought she liked it and smiled. “Okay.”

Xu Zhitong pressed down the mess of thoughts in her head and hummed softly as she snuggled with Lin Yang for a while longer.

She still didn’t dare get too close, though, since Lin Yang had lost blood and medication couldn’t completely erase the discomfort of period pain.

When the time looked about right, Xu Zhitong went to make dinner.

The moment she turned on the tap to wash her hands, she realized she hadn’t taken off the ring.

Inexperienced little rookie Xu Zhitong ran back out in a hurry to ask Lin Yang, “The ring got wet. Is that okay?”

Lin Yang had thought something had happened; when she heard that, she laughed and rubbed her head. “It’s fine. You can even wear it in the shower.”

Only then did Xu Zhitong finally relax.

She knew she was forgetful and prone to leaving things behind, so if she had to take the ring off for showering and cooking, what if she lost it one day?

Maybe the old her had worn the ring as a necklace like that opera performer.

But she didn’t want to do that.

This was her first ring; it was very meaningful.

That night, when she went live, Xu Zhitong still didn’t take it off. It glinted brightly on her little finger.

She’d originally thought the bullet comments would ask about it a lot.

In the past, whenever she streamed, fans had always been very curious about every accessory she wore. New rings, new necklaces; they’d ask what brand they were.

They even wanted her to post links in the fan group.

But right now, with that thing on her finger that looked unmistakably like a diamond ring, there weren’t many people asking.

The few that did were immediately drowned out by the scrolling public chat.

Xu Zhitong found it hard to understand.

Lin Yang, watching the public chat from the living room, understood.

She monitored SleepyBlue’s fan groups more closely and could also see some curious discussion among the fans.

The shape of the diamond ring was recognizable to anyone, but very few people suspected anything.

First, the diamond was too small, as if Xu Zhitong had bought it just for fun.

Second, it was worn on the pinky, a very tricky position; rather than suggesting a possible romance, it seemed more like it was hinting at marrying herself or being committed to staying single.

Third, the main CP trend for Xu Zhitong right now was her and “Cotton.” No one thought Xu Zhitong would have some “ambiguous someone” who would buy her such a small diamond ring; even using that ring to spread “rumors” felt beneath them.

So the gossip died before it could even hatch.

-

With the ring going unnoticed, the livestream ended. Xu Zhitong, not quite satisfied, ran to the living room to find Lin Yang.

Lin Yang was leaning against one end of the big sofa with a laptop in her hands. When she saw Xu Zhitong come out, she closed it.

Xu Zhitong stopped short in shock. “I thought you were watching my stream?”

Why was she working?!

Lin Yang explained, “I was watching the whole time; I just opened the computer. All right, come sit down. You worked hard on the livestream.”

Only then did Xu Zhitong let out a huff and sit neatly on the outer side of the sofa, pulling one leg up and turning her body toward Lin Yang.

She glanced over and saw that Lin Yang had already taken off the heat patch.

Xu Zhitong asked, “Does it still hurt?”

She’d asked that question countless times from noon until now.

Lin Yang said, “Just a little.”

That meant it still hurt, if only a little.

Xu Zhitong hesitated, then asked, “Then should I rub it for you?”

She’d wanted to do that all along.

She just hadn’t dared to start on her own.

When they were in school, she had massaged her a few times, but back then their relationship had been clean and innocent, and Xu Zhitong hadn’t had a single wandering thought.

Now they were girlfriends; touching someone’s body like that might be different.

Xu Zhitong pretended to be shy and sneaked looks at Lin Yang.

After a slight pause, Lin Yang indulged her. “What’s there to ask about that, Xiaotong?”

Oh!

Xu Zhitong stopped pretending at once and obediently reached her hand down.

She was a little embarrassed, so she kept her head lowered, following her own hand with her eyes.

When her fingers touched Lin Yang’s lower abdomen, Lin Yang still didn’t seem to react much, but Xu Zhitong’s own hand trembled first.

Lin Yang was wearing soft silk loungewear; below her lower abdomen there was a slight rounded rise, warm and soft.

Xu Zhitong steadied herself and gently massaged Lin Yang’s belly in clockwise circles.

At the same time, she made a desperate effort to keep her mind clean and blank.

It was difficult, but it had to be done.

She was even trying to breathe more lightly.

She massaged for a long time.

Just as she was about to successfully hypnotize herself into clearing every stray thought from her head, Lin Yang suddenly gave her wrist a gentle tug.

Xu Zhitong looked up in confusion.

In her field of vision, Lin Yang was biting her lip, apparently looking at her hand.

After a moment, Lin Yang looked at Xu Zhitong and said, “…Can I hug you?”

“...Ah, mm.”

It felt as if she’d been hit with a surprise grand prize.

Xu Zhitong’s heartbeat immediately sped up. Her mind went completely blank this time; she only knew to lean forward obediently, kneeling up onto the sofa and carefully wrapping her arms around Lin Yang.

At first it was just a quiet hug. Lin Yang was also silent, resting against Xu Zhitong’s shoulder, her breath brushing the hollow of Xu Zhitong’s neck.

That dense, fine itch made Xu Zhitong’s mind blank and her body stiff, one hand still trapped halfway over Lin Yang’s lower abdomen.

It took a very long time before she realized she still had a hand there.

Xu Zhitong, now operating purely on instinct, tried once more to rub Lin Yang’s stomach.

Before the motion was even halfway done, Lin Yang lifted her head from Xu Zhitong’s embrace.

She looked straight at Xu Zhitong.

The distance between them was very close; their breaths tangled together.

Lin Yang’s cheeks were red, her black-and-white eyes carrying a hazy wetness.

Xu Zhitong’s throat tightened for no reason, and her heartbeat sped up with it.

Her thoughts and movements nearly fell out of sync. A beat late, she realized what was happening, lowered her head, and kissed Lin Yang.

At first it was only a light, fleeting touch. Xu Zhitong tried to show her tenderness and care, but when her tongue brushed Lin Yang’s lower lip, she found that Lin Yang had already parted her mouth.

Her heart beat even harder. Her face growing hot, Xu Zhitong tilted her head to find a better angle and used everything she had learned from these few kisses to the fullest, struggling to keep her teeth in check as she pressed against Lin Yang’s lips and slowly eased her way in, trying to suck, lick, and taste her as gently as possible.

It was truly a very slow kiss; while they kissed, she held Lin Yang carefully, as if she were kissing a feather damp with mist.